BALTIMORE – (Satire News) – Many GOP pundits gave Kellyanne Conway 100% credit for getting Trump’s ass into the White House.
It is no secret that Conway spearheaded the Trumpster’s campaign, and lets face it, the washed-out, dishwater blonde knows a political trick or 7.
The Ann Coulter-lookalike talks so fast that she has been clocked at 29 lies per minute.
Mitch McConnell once said of Kellyanne that she is so sharp that she can recite the alphabet and then finish reciting it backwards before Eric “Sneezy” Trump has even gotten to the first H.
But like Boom Boom News reported, after the scandal with her teenage daughter Claudia hit the fan, it was all downhill for Mrs. Conway from that point forward.
First, her teenage daughter Claudia claimed that she took away her pet woodchuck and sold it to Barron Trump for $16.75.
Then Claudia said that her mother was secretly text President Putin every night after midnight.
But the thing that finally ended up being her downfall was when Melania caught her and Donaldo, in a passionate embrace in the Benedict Arnold Commemorative Bedroom in the White House.
So now, Kellyanne has left D.C. and she has allegedly been seen driving a taco truck in downtown Baltimore.