Big companies need big paychecks, so Apple, Microsoft, Amazon and others are laying off tons of workers.
“It’s not us, it’s the recession … it’s a much better excuse than blaming the rich,” said one source who ran screaming from my microphone.
Apple CEO Tim Cook, Morgan Stanley CEO James Gorman and Goldman Sachs CEO David Solomon have all cried into their beers as they skimmed off a few million from their personal pays (yet none said where that skimmed money will go … possibly to Switzerland, or Panama, or the Cayman Islands … just wondering).
When a billionaire has to give himself a pay cut, you know the economy is fucked … and likely because the billionaires fucked it.
When the recession is over, will they hire back all those workers, maybe give them all a raise for coming back and not spitting in their boss’ faces?
The source returned from their endless screaming, “Well now, let’s not get crazy. Rich men don’t like giving away any of their money, and definitely not to poor men. The poor are the victims of the rich, always have, always will. You think Gates, Musk or Bezos care about a single mom raising her kids? They pay to fuck single moms before their Alexa tells them it’s time to go to work and fire more people … oh God, I’ve said too much!”
And they went screaming away once again … good luck finding a job in 2023, and if you already have one, pray you have it for the entire year.
