Why Remove The Team Doctor From The Football Field?
Republicans are asleep at the wheel—again. It isn’t polite to call a group or any individual stupid, so it’s best to suggest they are asleep at the wheel. Okay? Okay. It seems now that Republicans have the majority in the House of Representatives…
Read full storySpicoli Wants Everybody to Die in Prison, After His Last Cigarette
Is Sean Penn getting older? Of course, it’s called time and gravity. But are those aspects of science wearing on his mind as well as his body? Oh sure, we all like to condemn people for being different, who doesn’t? We all say one thing and mean…
Read full storyThe new Chatbot at my Doctors Office is My Best Friend
Joe Smith, ex-barista at Star Buzz (recently replaced by a robot), speaks of his new found love of the automated telephone receptionist at his doctors office (he doesn't see the irony, he's American). She a has the sexiest voice on the phone. She'…
Read full storySuper Satan to the Alito Rescue!
Hello friend … or fiend. Has Jesus hurt you? Touched you … in your heart or soul, and never let go? Trillions of Christians have been butchered by doctrine and priests and nuns and popes for 2000 years, and it’s not stopping. Who will shut down th…
Read full storyHenry the 8th Gold Necklace found in Warwickshire - Bawdy Inscription on Back
An ancient solid gold woman's necklace was found by a metal Detectorist in Warwickshire and just now has been authenticated. It is made of heavy gold links and has a large heart shaped medallion with Royal symbols on it for Henry and his first wi…
Read full storyBig Nose Hairy Sneezes Top Secret Surveillance
A man with the world’s longest nostril hairs has been recruited by MI5 as a double secret spy, since every one of the hairs poking from his nose can pick up secret communications from around the world … and beyond! With a slight tweak of certain h…
Read full storyThe Groundhog Says: “Fuck Off with Your Winter and Let Me Sleep!”
It’s Groundhog Day in the Northern Americas, where weather is controlled by rodents, and Pawshequmaddiqiiiqqquuizhhdhd Phil (or whatever the thing has been named by City Fathers) has refused to come out! A tiny microphone was squeezed into Phil’s…
Read full storyHow’s About A Down Under Fiver, Chuck?
Australia will not have King Charles the 3rd (this time, he’s doing it to protect the family name … and for the money) on its fiver. Instead they will have something by an indigenous artist. This could be scary news to Britain. Other colonies may…
Read full storyTrump Is Shocked To Hear That The FBI Found $27 Million In Drug Cartel Money In The Mar-a-Lago Estate Basement
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida - (Satire News) - Trump has told agents with the FBI, that he has no idea how the hell $27 million in cartel money ended up in his Mar-a-Lago basement. He said that they should perhaps talk to his two spacey sons, Don "Dopey" T…
Read full storyThe Official Number 10 Trampoline – For PMs ONLY!
Rishi Sunak, the greatest Prime Minister of the British Empire, has bought himself a present for remaining in office for a 100 days! Wow! That’s (my math’s not too good, but …. carry the 2) that’s more than 44 days! He bought himself (well, tax pa…
Read full storyMost Fox News Trump Ass Kissers Say They Have Now Seen The Light
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - The iNews News Agency reports that most former Fox News Trump supporters have finally seen the light, and they now say that Trump is nothing more than a agnostic, draft-dodging, pussy grabbing asshole, who just needs t…
Read full storyThe New Hampshire Senate Says No To The Word Vagina
CONCORD, New Hampshire - (Satire News) - The state senate of New Hampshire has voted to ban the use of the word Vagina. Sen. Lucy DuBrizzi, 76, of Cunt Creek, New Hampshire, said that her constituents, who are all church-going folks cringe wheneve…
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