How’s About A Down Under Fiver, Chuck?

Funny story written by Ana Sian

Thursday, 2 February 2023

image for How’s About A Down Under Fiver, Chuck?
Enough with the Royals Staring Back with Their Lifeless Eyes ... We Want Our Money Back!

Australia will not have King Charles the 3rd (this time, he’s doing it to protect the family name … and for the money) on its fiver. Instead they will have something by an indigenous artist.

This could be scary news to Britain. Other colonies may do likewise and give a voice and a face to their indigenous peoples on their money, since it’s not really British money, it’s colonial money, just with a British stain on it (sorry, British royal on it … my thumbs type so fatly).

There may be RED INDIANS on the money of Canada. (Do they still like being called that? Well, let’s not ask to find out the truth.) Or there may be Maori people or designs on New Zealand money. Or maybe a mighty and proud Mau Mau warrior (who is not confined to a British torture concentration camp, but instead with the head of a royal in hand) on the Kenyan money, or … well, so many indigenous peoples were butchered by the “most civilized empire in history” that some of them simply don’t exist. Gone the way of the dodo … which is also believed to be a victim of extinction by British hands.

So if King Chuck ever heads down under and only has a fiver on him to buy a stuffed koala for Camilla’s pillow, he may be disappointed at not seeing himself looking back from the crinkled bank note in his soft, smooth, white, bloodless palm.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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