Hong Kong Has Gone Wrong So No Throngs …of Tourists
No one wants to visit Hong Kong. The tourism industry is hurting so bad they’re giving free plane tickets to anyone who wants to come. Why won’t the world visit Chinese territory? Don’t they want to see the wonders of China – the fast trains, the…
Read full storyHow Long is Merrick’s Clock? (I said CLOCK, not … never mind)
Merrick … we’re all still waiting for Merrick … they say he’s close and closing in more and more, but they’ve been saying that for a while. Can the government arrest itself? A question I don’t think even Socrates or Aristotle could figure out.
Read full storyBlack Hole Discovered on Earth!
So the Chinese and their white balloon is met by America and its black chemical cloud of death. Who to hate more? The planet Earth now has a mole, just like Jupiter. And what's that big red spot made up of? And how many living things are on th…
Read full storyRaquel Welch … A Kiss
One of the most gorgeous and sexiest and talented women alive … is now dead. Raquel Welch never wore my panties, and I never wore hers. But hopefully, in the afterlife, we can enjoy each other, whenever I get there. Raquel is there now giving all…
Read full storyIs Vanilla a Flavor – Or A Stinking Lie?
Ice cream scientists the world over are asking some important questions, and getting few answers. Sure, we can all agree that chocolate is a flavor … a sweet delicious manly flavor that never lets you down and keeps you craving for more – MORE god…
Read full storyChildless, Single Women Are Satan’s Big Tools!
Are single, childless women a tool of the devil? Several pastors from various churches – the Bleeding Heart of Jesus, Mother Mary Quite Contrary, the Agonizing and Seeping Wounds of God, and Snake Handlers ‘R Us – have all gotten together to form…
Read full storyRap Star Gets Arrested – AGAIN – for Either Being Black or Writing a Song, Whatever Fits
Rising Rap Super Star, Homey B-Boy Pizza Slice Fresh Dope Gang Dog, has released his latest album, “Mass Shootie My Booty”, with a big hit that is making the police of America worried and nervous that people still don’t see them as “their friendly ne…
Read full storyThe New Paris Protest Song for Revolution and Good Wine Pairings
The streets of Paris run red … with light and song and minstrels in the streets, banging their tambourines and ringing their bells, chanting and singing a new song for a new revolution! Will the world take notice, or will the media cameras of the…
Read full storyBob Dylan Sings the Ballad of Elmer J. Fudd
Bob Dylan was the voice of a generation. Born in 1802, the young Dylan rode the rails and played guitar and sang songs for food. He rose to fame during the 1960s when everybody was discontent, except for those who made the laws and kept everybody els…
Read full storyThe Stock Market Wants to Buy & Sell YOU
Capitalism knows no bounds, and it’s only getting stronger. Since capitalism is creating our world, turning everything into a commodity which can ONLY be owned by the super rich, there’s something new to be bought and sold. YOU! That’s right…
Read full storyThe Cult of Cher Shall Rise, No Pro-Bono
Pasadena, Going Back to Cali … A new cult has arisen in the land of cults, California, where Charles Manson was once a star. The Cult of Cher wants you to love Cher as they do. Will you sacrifice your first born for the Queen of Cherness? W…
Read full storyHuey Lewis Sings: “I Want A New Country”
Huey Lewis hasn’t been heard from since the 1980s and “Back to the Future”, but he’s still alive! Amazing how some popular people vanish when a new decade arrives. But Huey and His News have returned and have dropped a hit record, hoping for renew…
Read full storyMcDonalds Introduces Its Adults Only Big Mac, McFries, and McBeer Combo
CALEXICO, California - (Satire News) - The McDonalds fast food chain has just come up with a new menu meal combo that has proved to be extremely successful. Mickey D's has started selling it's Big Mac, McFries, and McBeer Combo for Adults Only, in…
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