
FibalongaBoris Greatest Hits
The Prime Minister's debut album, FibalongaBoris, is a quasi-singalong of some of the best lies launched up to now. "I want to make sure the slate's not wiped clean just because people elected me. I am proud of my cunning, and this CD is a sort of...
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Nashville Man Impresses Friends by Contemplating Registering for Ultra-Marathon
Friends of 42-year-old Dave Paxton of Nashville, Tennessee, were greatly impressed when Paxton informed them that he was contemplating registering for a 50-mile ultra-marathon. “To me, it’s doubly impressive considering that he doesn’t even run or...
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Local Man Denies Writing Comeback Rumours
Local man, and once prolific writer of absolute bollocks, crap jokes, sob stories, knob-related gubbins and generally unfunny shite, Martin Shuttlecock, today denied that he was all set for a writing comeback. Speaking today from the tiny caravan...
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Thomas Markle to reprise Jabba The Hutt role in Star Wars The Musical
The controversial father of the Duchess of Sussex, Thomas Markle, is to star in a Broadway musical version of Star Wars, playing the slug-like crime lord, Jabba The Hutt, reprising the role he made famous in the blockbuster movie. Markle, 107, has...
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Manchester United: Old Trafford Empty At Final Whistle
Manchester United boss, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, will face further pressure on his position in the morning, after his lacklustre side caved-in and lost at home to Burnley tonight, with the fans showing their total disgust about the performance by walkin...
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Thousand pound male seeks bride; finds, but it doesn't last
Strong man from Northern Pakistan, Arbab Khizer Hayat, has responded sympathetically to a fellow hulk's plight who came forward yesterday. This new figure in the mammoth male field felt obliged to share his experience with Mr. Hayat after the latt...
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