Thomas Markle to reprise Jabba The Hutt role in Star Wars The Musical

Written by Clive Danton

Thursday, 23 January 2020

image for Thomas Markle to reprise Jabba The Hutt role in Star Wars The Musical

The controversial father of the Duchess of Sussex, Thomas Markle, is to star in a Broadway musical version of Star Wars, playing the slug-like crime lord, Jabba The Hutt, reprising the role he made famous in the blockbuster movie.

Markle, 107, has reportedly lost nearly 100lbs to get back into shape for the role in the forthcoming Andrew Lloyd Webber spectacular, which opens on February 1st.

It is not yet known whether the outspoken Mr Markle will be eating live insects as he did in the screen version, but it is understood he has requested to be allowed to do so in his contract.

Markle, whose vitriolic attacks on his daughter, Meghan, have gathered pace lately, will be joined in the production by diminutive screen legend, Tom Cruise, who will be playing the popular droid, R2-D2, and ex-legendary strongman, Arnold Schwarzenegger, who will take on the role of Princess Leia.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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