The Queen Shows Her Cheek In Christmas Speech
Every Christmas Day, the Queen makes a speech to the nation. Usually, it is a dull reminder of events that happened during the year, but yesterday, it appeared that her scriptwriter was Kenneth Williams (or Alan Carr, more likely, because Williams is…
Read full storySanta Claus Feared Dead
There are worrying reports coming in this morning, after it was claimed that Santa Claus, who, without fail, turns up at the home of every good child in the world on 25 December, did not turn up last night. Concerned members of the public jammed t…
Read full storyBoris Johnson In 'Kick Me' Incident
British Prime Minister Boris Johnson is at the centre of an assault claim this morning, after he alleged that various European leaders 'ganged-up' on him after the end of the latest Brussels summit, and took turns to kick him up the bottom. Johnso…
Read full storyThe Company That Makes Sports Fans Cardboard Cut-Outs Is Making a Killing
EL SEGUNDO, California – (Sports Satire) – The company that manufactures sports fan cardboard cut-outs reports that it is making money hand-over-fist. CEO Barnabas Ballyhoo, with Cut-Outs Inc., told the Balls News Agency that just since the Corona…
Read full storyMadonna Finally Gets That Gap In Her Teeth Fixed
NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – LaLaLand Daily reports that, after 62 years, Madonna has finally gotten that huge gap in her teeth fixed. Macadamia Honeysuckle reported that the penny-pinching songstress, who is either loved or hated, decided to f…
Read full storyExtraterrestrials Land in Iowa and Quickly Leave
CORN SHUCK, Iowa – (Satire News) – Corn Shuck’s Eye Spectator News, reports that corn farmer Moses Ripple was out rotating the crops, when he saw a weird object in the western sky. Ripple, who recently won $915 on an instant scratch-off ticket, sa…
Read full storyVice President Mike Pence Between Trump And A Hard Place
Call it Trump or a rock, same thing. But Pence is between Trump and a difficult choice. Pence has to think of his future or ignore his future. Whether it’s nobler for him to suffer the outrageous slings and arrows of Trump’s pee-wee tweets, or ta…
Read full storyBoris Johnson to ask Ethiopia to return Live Aid food
Britain is beginning to starve, partly because of increased poverty caused by government incompetence and indifference, and partly thanks to food lorries being stuck in queues in Kent. The combined crises of coronavirus and Brexit are hitting hard, a…
Read full storyMan Disappointed That Santa Claus Didn't Visit
Geoff Lone, 46, of Chaffinch St Cock, was bitterly disappointed that he did not receive a visit from Santa Claus on Christmas night. "I waited by the fireplace until the sun came up," slurred the gin-soaked former builder. "He never came." Mr L…
Read full storyJack and Diane Embroiled in Bitter Divorce
Back in 1982, John Mellencamp's little ditty about Jack and Diane went viral, transforming two small town kids into household names. But the years haven't been kind to the two American kids living in the Heartland, who recently announced their pla…
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