NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – LaLaLand Daily reports that, after 62 years, Madonna has finally gotten that huge gap in her teeth fixed.
Macadamia Honeysuckle reported that the penny-pinching songstress, who is either loved or hated, decided to finally fork over $37,000 for the gap-removing procedure.
The 62-year-old singer said that the reason she finally decided to close the gap was because it had actually gotten bigger, and when she would sing notes in the high register, they would actually measure 117 decibels on the decibel chart.
She also said that it was embarrassing when she would be talking, and, all of a sudden, a piece of Cheeto or sardine would come flying out of the wide gap.
Madonna said she will miss the fact she will no longer be able to put a straw through the gap in her teeth, and drink tea, a Diet Dr. Pepper, or a papaya margarita.
The native of Bay City, Michigan told Miss Honeysuckle that she had just finished recording an album with Beyonce and Megan Thee Stallion, titled, “We’re One Fine-Looking Oreo Cookie”.