Funny story: Esther McVey - My teenage sherbert dip shame

Esther McVey - My teenage sherbert dip shame

Following on from news of Michael Gove's indiscretions with cocaine, Liverpudlian former TV host, and potential future Prime Minister, Esther McVey, has told us of her secret teenage sherbert dip habit. In her scouse accent, she told us 'I was onl...

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Funny story: Man catches big Pike, still doesn't understand why he isn't more popular on dating sites

Man catches big Pike, still doesn't understand why he isn't more popular on dating sites

Brian Asshat, 63, grammar pedant, agoraphobic neo-nazi, and closet fisherman, has caught the biggest pike he has ever seen, and is still not proving to be that popular on dating website, Firestarter.com. 'This fish was massive. It was huge, bigger...

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Funny story: Michael Gove could still be an excellent tea-boy

Michael Gove could still be an excellent tea-boy

Michael Gove, the full adult form of fictional house-elf Dobby, has revealed that he would still like the opportunity to be 10 Downing Street's first-call tea-boy. A cocaine-taking past may have scuppered his chances of the top job, but he still h...

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Funny story: Teresa May regrets running through wheat story

Teresa May regrets running through wheat story

Following on from the news that most of the front-runners to become Prime Minister have a drug-fuelled past, Teresa May admits that she regrets saying the running through the Wheatfields of local farmers in her youth was the worst of her transgressio...

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Funny story: Man Was Left Aghast At Schiphol Airport Signage

Man Was Left Aghast At Schiphol Airport Signage

A wearied transit passenger waiting patiently for an onward flight at Amsterdam's Schiphol Airport, has told of how he was left "aghast" after reading a sign informing travellers: U kunt hier wachten voor ass Moys Kenwood, 55, was travelling fr...

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Funny story: George RR Martin Has Been Busy Writing Books Again

George RR Martin Has Been Busy Writing Books Again

George RR Martin, the man responsible for the books upon which the TV fantasy drama 'Game Of Thrones' is based, is a tireless author. This doesn't mean he hasn't got any tires, it means that he rarely puts his pencil and notepad down. Martin takes...

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Funny story: Charismatic Nashville Man Explains that If You Were He, You’d Be a Narcissist, Too

Charismatic Nashville Man Explains that If You Were He, You’d Be a Narcissist, Too

After years of feigning modesty out of fear of coming across as arrogant and self-centered, Caleb Treble of Nashville, Tennessee, finally helped his friends understand that his narcissism is a natural byproduct of his inherent superiority and that if...

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Funny story: More Tory Leadership Candidates Reveal Drug-Fuelled Pasts

More Tory Leadership Candidates Reveal Drug-Fuelled Pasts

The Tory Leadership stakes have risen dramatically in the last 24 hours, with more and more candidates confessing to past illegal drug-use, writes Archery, Bridge, Hare-Jugging, Real Tennis, Topological Homeomorphism and Political Correspondent, Clai...

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Funny story: Tories Looking For New Dealer

Tories Looking For New Dealer

London, UK - (Snorting Mess): Conservatives must appoint a new Narcotic Business Secretary following the collapse of the government’s flagshit Brexit New Deal Strategy which left ministers exposed as a bunch of crack-peddling tossers in hock to Donal...

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Funny story: Homophobe Pride Parade to go ahead

Homophobe Pride Parade to go ahead

In Butte, Montana, an unusual event is due to take place later this month. While many cities around the world are celebrating gay pride with a parade, in Butte a group of homophobes will march through the streets. Organiser Geoff Muncher explaine...

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Funny story: Theresa May bombshell: My saucy romps with Morecambe and Wise

Theresa May bombshell: My saucy romps with Morecambe and Wise

Departing Prime Minister, Theresa May, yesterday dropped the bombshell that she enjoyed a series of saucy sex romps with the much-loved comic duo, Morecambe and Wise during the 70s, when she was an up-and-coming figure in her local Conservative Assoc...

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Funny story: Man In Potato Chips Advert Was Wearing Far Too Much Lipstick

Man In Potato Chips Advert Was Wearing Far Too Much Lipstick

A male actor in a TV advertisement for some potato chips, was wearing an extraordinary amount of lipstick, leading one viewer to think, not unreasonably, that the man might have been a homosexual. The chips, Jacks, a product by Calbee, are delicio...

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Funny story: Theresa May Found Crouching Under Scottish Bridge

Theresa May Found Crouching Under Scottish Bridge

Theresa May, the former British prime minister, who resigned from her position as Conservative party leader on Friday, has been discovered by three walkers in the Scottish Highlands, crouching under a bridge. The incident took place near Ben Nevis...

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Funny story: Airline Profits by Flying Deportees to Repressive Homeland

Airline Profits by Flying Deportees to Repressive Homeland

Los Angeles, CA. Police were called to quell a disturbance this morning at the annual stockholders meeting of Baja Pacific Airlines. A melee occurred when a outraged stockholder tried to propose a motion to terminate a very lucrative contract with...

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