QAnon Lid Blown Sky High: John Bolton Hints Of Secret Leader's Identity
BILLINGSGATE POST: Under intensive questioning by George Staphylococcus, Trump National Security Advisor John Bolton revealed hints that would lead even a casual observer to believe former Secret Service Agent Slim Everdingle is the mysterious head...
Read full storyNational Rifle Association Is Shooting Blanks
Great Scott! The NRA is in a financial crisis? If they need money, why not use their products, march into any bank and make a crisis-eliminating withdrawal? And, if the NRA does go under and have a funeral, Donald Trump Jr. should be a pallbearer...
Read full storyThe Other, Unofficial and Definitely Un-Presidential Meanings of 'POTUS'.
Our national beloved love of acronyms has brought us a new term for our fearless Führers. The term, which took me a while to understand, as everyone tells you acronyms but doesn't bother to translate them for you, is 'POTUS' - the initials standing for 'President Of The United States'. Due to our present feckless leader, there have come about other definitions of the term as well - some (or most)...
Read full storyBarry Chuckle Has Chuckled His Last Chuckle
Barry Chuckle, one half of the Chuckle Brothers, the zany, chuckling, brothers who caused so much chuckling in the 1980s, 90s and in the early part of this century, has chuckled his very last chuckle, I can confirm. Barry, 73, had been ill for som...
Read full storyCISA Certified Mohd Aidil Harith Resigns From BPMB After 5 Year Stint
Mr. Mohd Aidil Harith has resigned from Bank Pembangunan Malaysia Berhad's (BPMB) System Auditor with immediate effect. Aidil has been with the Bank for the past 5 years since May 2013 and has changed BPMB's IT landscape. Aidil is a Certified Info...
Read full storyMan And His Friends Used To Play Strange Game At School
A man has revealed how, more than 40 years ago, he and his friends at school used to play a strange game that has been described as nonsensical, insane, crazy, barmy, madcap, stupid, and even idiotic. Moys Kenwood, 55, attended Sydney Smith High School in Hull between 1976 and 1979, and had several friends whose state-of-mind was 'questionable' at best. Those boys had developed a strange game w...
Read full storyJumbo Jet Lands On School Playing Field
Disaster was narrowly averted today when the pilot of a British Airways Jumbo Jet mistook a school playing field for an airport runway, and landed his flight on it. The flight, BA296, from Chicago to London Heathrow, should have been 2 miles farth...
Read full storyTrump Brothers Withdraw All of the U.S.Treasury's Money and Lose it All on Roulette
Las Vegas, NV Donald Trump, Jr., Eric Trump, and their brother-in-law, Jared Kushner, talked Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin into giving them a blank treasury check to bet with because they had a "sure thing." "Well, Donnie and I were talking ab...
Read full storyTrump Gives Speech About How He's Keeping His Campaign Promises
Miami, Texas President Trump is down in the polls as usual, and as usual, to boost his spirits, he went to another godforsaken town that still somehow loves him. Faux TV is carrying it live: "And so everyone can see that I will fulfill all my camp...
Read full storyMan Reads Giant Book on Vacation, Uses it to Beat Up Shark
A local man bought a giant book on vacation and acted like he read it on the beach. “I wanted to impress the other families we were vacationing with, so I brought this massive book the size of a toaster with me to the beach every day, and I 'fake...
Read full storyTo Would or Would Not - Part 2
Melon Niaromanski ducked under the tables soon as the shooting started. She immediatly starte crawling towards the "Wouldn't" door, but she ran into Treetrunk halfway. "They've got the street blocked out front, its no good that way slim," said Treetrunk. "Well its not any good where I came from and stop calling me slim, the name is Melon." "Sorry Slim, its hard to get me off a nickname once I...
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