That thing you did......
As an interviewer of celebrities, who find themselves in my neck of the woods, they are at either end of their career. They are all eager, with bright shiny faces, and wanting to get on with the job, or their career is in the doldrums, following a sex scandal, or a down-turn in the number of Northern characters television needs, and lets face it, any actor from Downton Abbey can work on a gritt...
Read full storyTeresa May not scared by petitions on Social Media
Political Puppet Teresa 'I am really only Prime Minister because no-one else wanted to be Prime Minister, and nobody wanted Boris Johnson to be Prime Minister' May has said, once and and for all that petitions on Social Media have no bearing on how s...
Read full storyOpinion: Trump V Syria
US windbag and all round walking political piss take, Donald Trump, has defended his “mission accomplished” tweet after it was ridiculed by actual media outlets. The same outlets Donald keeps claiming are fake. It always seems odd to us that a man with no political qualifications sits in a political job and calls qualified individuals “fake”. Anyway we digress.... Of course Donald authorised ai...
Read full storyEditorial: May Attacks Syria
So after PM May decided “fuck it” and bombed the shit out of another country on tenuous evidence (where have we heard this before) she now fears a public backlash. The main shame is that she won’t be receiving said “back lashes” across her back with a glass encrusted whip. The carrion eyed cunt completely misjudged the public appetite for more wanton slaughter from above and now fear repercussi...
Read full storyHydrogren and Oxygen really only sticking together for the kids
Mike Hydrogen and Kate Oxygen, known throughout the world as the important duo Water, have admitted that they are really only sticking together for the kids. Hydrogren said: 'I always felt I was doing all of the work. There I was, putting in twice...
Read full storyXenomorph rejected from another job, again
Diane Smith, a Xenomorph, best known for a fleeting appearance in the Alien: Resolution film has spoken about being rejected for another job. The eight foot tall alien, who bleeds acid, and has an unfortunate habit of incubating her offspring with...
Read full storyThe Lighthouse Keeper - A Prose Poem
Mr Jones, the Lighthouse Keeper, had an ever increasing collection of masks, finding them on Amazon, going for a song on Ebay, fading celebrities, an Amazonian Warrior, Donald Trump, the colour of desperation, everyday waiting for the knock. The Postman whistling his happy little tune, handing over the packages, waiting for the signatures, the always offered cup of tea, wanting to g...
Read full storyStormy says three-legged donkey involved
Stormy Daniels has revealed Donald Trump brought a donkey to her Las Vegas hotel room 10 years ago for a fun threesome. "Man that was one ugly ass, and the critter didn't look too good neither 'coz he was missing one leg ya'll". Daniels continued, "Y...
Read full storyElmo feeling sad, says Elmo
Lovable red Muppet, Elmo is sad because Elmo has been told to stop talking in the third person. Elmo doesn't understand this, as Elmo is only a young Muppet, although he has been on the show for years, and knows things about life that even Happy M...
Read full story'No Shit News' Goes On Air
A brand new news station has gone 'on air' today, aiming to combat the current trend by some media companies to misreport, manipulate, or even completely fabricate 'news' to suit their own sordid political agendas. 'No Shit News' (NSN) is the idea...
Read full storyMark Zuckerberg Unfriended By Thousands On Facebook
Mark Zuckerberg, the CEO of Facebook, who has been answering questions before Congress about his company's relationship with Cambridge Analytica, has been feeling the backlash this week - he's been 'Unfriended' by more than 50,000 'friends'. The c...
Read full story