Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson Wins!
WEST MONROE, Louisiana - Phil Robertson the patriarch of the Duck Dynasty's Robertson family has just announced that A&E has backed down and they have lifted his suspension from the popular television cable show. Robertson sat in his living ro...
Read full storySarah Palin's Tea Bag Party Wants Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson To Be Their Presidential Candidate For 2016
WALNUT SHADE, Missouri - The infamous Tea Bag Party has just announced to the national news media that they are both thrilled and honored to make an announcement regarding the 2016 presidential election. The executive director of The Tea Bag Party...
Read full storyMichelle Obama Responds To The Rumors About Her Husband And Danish Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Michelle Obama was shopping at a local Walmart when she was approached by a reporter with National Focus Magazine. Durango Tucker asked the first lady about the rumors that she is very upset at her husband's flirting with Helle...
Read full storyMadonna Rants That Christina Aguilera Is Too Skinny And That Someone Needs To Give Her A Hot Dog
NEW YORK CITY - Madonna was out in Central Park walking her pet flamingo when she was approached by an entertainment news program reporter. Vodka Vermicelli with iRumors asked the "Don't Cry For Me Argentina" singer what she thought about Christin...
Read full storyPutin-topping fantasies dominate London's Russian elite
London, UK - A poll of 1,000 London-based Russian businessmen with a personal net worth of between $20 and $250million has revealed their Top 10 favorite dinner party talking points ahead of the Russian Winter Olympics. "At pole position is the p...
Read full storyCharlie Sheen Wants Kim Jong Un To Appear On His TV Comedy Show Anger Management
HOLLYWOOD - Charlie Sheen has always been a master at knowing how to get the TV ratings up. He carried Two and A Half Men to the top of the sitcom charts before he began clashing with the show's creator, producer, and chief writer Chuck Lorre. Now...
Read full storyJay Leno Explains Politics
As Jay Leno winds down his career, many have noticed a new "bite" in some of his jokes and comments. Last night proved to be no exception as the late night comic gave his take on the current American political scene. The following is a word for wor...
Read full storyJoan Rivers Says No To Appearing On Dancing With The Stars
NEW YORK CITY - Joan Rivers prides herself in being known as the Queen of Mean. And she has certainly demonstrated that she has some big far reaching claws on many occasions. The 80-year-old comedian was recently asked by the producers of the hit...
Read full storyObama not a US citizen!
Barack Obama was born August 4th, 1961 in Honolulu, Hawaii. Or was he? Obama has feverishly defended that he was born in the United States, but has failed to produce a birth certificate. We have discovered why. After a long arduous search Obama's bir...
Read full storyIt's Official: Canada Most Boring Country in the Anglosphere
Researchers at Oxford University have bestowed upon Canada the dubious distinction of being the most boring of the six countries that comprise what's known as the Anglosphere: Australia, Canada, England, Ireland, New Zealand, and the United States.
Read full storyEU teaches Spanish food manufacturers cheese and ham making techniques
Remember the Black Foot semi rotten Iberico ham served in Spanish Cafes on the Costas? Or perhaps the off-flavoured translucent cheese served with tooth shattering sweet bread rolls? The EU may shortly be insisting that Spain's food makers look outsi...
Read full storyWhere are our shouting "Nutjobs"
Once a part of every city street, but now only found in cultured cities like Glasgow, shouting "head cases" are disappearing from our parks and shopping centres. Dirty, often threatening and intoxicated, these charming "fruitcakes" are becoming a r...
Read full storySlimy Siren Has Traded Her Tongue In On A Nun Habit
After years of playing the stupid little girl Horny Montoona for the demonic Dismal Network, and then overnight turning into a pornographic female version of Krampus the Christmas Demon and "twerking" up a tempest on stage for a few months, (Twerking...
Read full storyNew Chief At Dep't of Homeland Security Thinks It's A Piece Of Cake
The Department of Homeland Security has a new chief, Jeh Johnson. He takes over a department that includes 22 former agencies folded into it. The tasks of Homeland Security involve preventing terrorism through surveillance, disaster relief through...
Read full storyRoyal Pardon for paedo Savile in Brits' 2014 New Year's Honors
London, UK - Queen Elizabeth is to issue a Royal Pardon in the New Year's Honors List forgiving one of the nation's top sex offenders plus some very lucky mates. The new spirit of reconciliation with excluded minorities means prolific serial perv...
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