Sarah Palin's Tea Bag Party Wants Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson To Be Their Presidential Candidate For 2016

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 27 December 2013

image for Sarah Palin's Tea Bag Party Wants Duck Dynasty's Phil Robertson To Be Their Presidential Candidate For 2016
Sarah Palin's own party has abandoned her and left her high and dry.

WALNUT SHADE, Missouri - The infamous Tea Bag Party has just announced to the national news media that they are both thrilled and honored to make an announcement regarding the 2016 presidential election.

The executive director of The Tea Bag Party Silas P. Pripski has revealed that after holding a meeting of the party's board of directors they have decided that they will throw their full support behind Duck Dynasty patriarch Phil Robertson.

Mr. Pripski said that Mr. Robertson is exactly the kind of individual that they want representing their party.

He did note that he isn't exactly thrilled with Robertson's scroungy looking beard but he noted that like Apache Chief Geronimo once said, "Hey, you can't have everything."

The conservative publication GOPicky Magazine was asked where that would leave the Tea Bag Party founder and frontrunner hopeful Sarah Palin.

He looked down and said that the way he sees it, it leaves the Alaskan Moose Mama out in the cold, so to speak.

Sarah Palin was contacted by GOPicky Magazine and asked to comment on the Tea Bag Party's decision to go with Robertson instead of with her.

She replied, "Ya know that just ain't right. I mean gosh darnit I literally worked my ass off - or at least most of my ass off to get the Tea Bag Party to the high level that it has attained and now they are going to go with some Oak Ridge Boys looking bayou dweller. It just ain't right."

SIDENOTE: When Phil Robertson was contacted and told about how upset Sarah Palin was about the matter he grinned and said, "Well the chubby geography-challenged has-been can just build a damn bridge and get over it."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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