Spoof Writer Can't Wait for New Season of 'House'
Pittsburgh, PA - Spoof writer Jordan Baugher simply cannot wait for the new season of House to start on September 21st on Fox, Monday at 8/7 central. "He just does the zaniest shit. He can't save a patient without almost killing him four times.
Read full storyNew GPS on International Space Station Malfunctioning
A Space Shuttle mission by Discovery delivered a new Global Positioning Unit to the International Space Station this week. The new GPS unit, however, is not working. Instead of placing the station 26,000 miles above the earth in orbit, the new unit...
Read full storyScottish Man Who Says "That's Thinkin' With Your Dipstick" Revealed
In a series of television commercials for a major oil company, a Scottish man runs around hitting people who choose the wrong brand for their cars. He swats them on the back of their legs and says "Think with your dipstick, Jimmy" or "That's thinkin...
Read full storyC.D.C. Determines Asparagus Causes Traffic Accidents
Experts and researchers at the Centers for Disease Control in Atlanta have determined that the vegetable asparagus may be the cause of most traffic fatalities in the United States. This information has been relayed to Congress and legislation bannin...
Read full storyFDA Warns People to Check Expiration Date on Edible Undies
The Food and Drug Administration is warning consumers to check the expiration date on any packages of edible undies that they might have at home. Once past their expiration date, this product is unsafe to wear and unfit for human consumption. Dr.
Read full storyA recession tip: easier way to give up smoking!
You can give up smoking quite easily by sticking one cigarette from each new pack up a fat friend's arse, filter first, then replacing it in the box. The possibility of putting that one in your mouth will put you off smoking any of them. This would also make a great party game of 'Russian Roulette', and is also the fastest way to lose friends!...
Read full storyInterpol seeks arrest of Mark Lowton
LONDON (ABSNN) - It's been a tough few days for TheSpoof.com CEO and Executive Editor, Mark Lowton. Thursday night Lowton was arrested for the illegal possession of pickled cackleberries with the intent to smell. Bail was arranged for Lowton, but h...
Read full storyWTF Upset About Sarah Palin Claiming Roseanne's Crown
The WTF (White Trash Federation) is very upset that Sarah Palin has laid claim to being the new Queen of the White Trash, stealing the crown from Roseanne Barr. The WTF feels that Sarah Palin put her "almost son-in-law" Levi Johnson up to saying a...
Read full storyAlan Carr Turns 'Em On In Blackpool
The famous Blackpool Illuminations, six miles of multi-coloured light bulbs which annually manage to somehow entice thousands of unemployed Mancunians to the run-down north-western shanty town, have this year been switched on by comic and chat show h...
Read full storyRobert Pattinson Possessed By Michael Jackson?
According to Kristin Stewart, co-star Robert Pattinson has began acting very strange of late. "At first, I thought Rob was just screwing around, something he always enjoys, and singing some of Michael Jackson's songs. I mean Michael was great and...
Read full story"American Gothic" a Communist Work of Art
Chicago - What started as a trickle has turned into a flood. Americans are adrift in a sea of Communist art. "Our purple mountains are being eroded by red waves," said Joe Smith. Smith says he became aware of the Communist plot to destroy America...
Read full storyWoody Allen turns to Jesus with help from French First Lady
Carla Bruni, former model, actress and ... singer, now wife of French president Nicolas Sarkozy, therefore First Lady of France, is to star in the next Woody Allen movie. She is to play a heavily-pregnant Virgin Mary. Woody has not completed th...
Read full storyBye-Bye Judge Nunez, Don't Forget The Stab-Vest
Quito - (Classic Mossad Mess): Chevron-hoax Judge Juan Nunez has gone into hiding after being outed on the BigOilYouBoob! channel accepting a bribe. The hireling of Ecuadorian amateur ventriloquist President Rafaele Correa Judge Nunez was filmed d...
Read full storyPrice of tin foil hats skyrocket as demand soars
New York - Tin foil hat prices struck a 12 year high Friday, breaching 3 dollars in New York, after it was confirmed that President Obama will give a speech to US students on September 8th. The Association of Tin Foil Hat Manufacturers had said in...
Read full storyMasturbation is good for you and could be compulsory by 2010
In Medical News the Government's new Surgeon General Sir Felchington Throb-Gland has announced that Masturbation is good for you, it is also believed that it could be compulsory by the next general election. In a speech from his Hampstead Heath M...
Read full storySecretary Chu Replaced As Obama Reviews Energy Policy
In an announcement that is certain to cause shock waves around the political world, US President Barack Obama announced today that he has decided to replace current Energy Secretary, Dr Steven Chu, co-winner of the Nobel Prize for Physics in 1997, an...
Read full storyMiley Cyrus Tangles With Spiderman
The recent purchase of Marvel Comics with Disney is turning out to have some unanticipated clashes between titans. In an effort to merge the two companies Marvel superheroes The Incredible Hulk and Spiderman were slated to be guest stars on the Ha...
Read full storySusan Boyle's Album "Since His Penis Came Between Us" Tops Charts
The best-known Britain's Got Talent contestant by far, Susan Boyle, should be really happy to know that her debut album, "Since His Penis Came Between Us" has topped the bestsellers list before its release, according to Radio Music. The album tit...
Read full storyKristen Stewart Finally Admits Martha Stewart Is Her Biological Grandmother
NEW YORK CITY - After months of lots and lots of speculation, intonation, contemplation, and guesstimation, unnamed reliable sources have stated that Martha Stewart is in fact Kristen Stewart's biological grandmother. Martha who is 68, and Kristen...
Read full storyAl Gore Offers Global Warming Out For A Fight
'Controversy in Washington' may not seem like such a unique or unusually story. But this time the eyes really do have to be rubbed to believe what is unfolding in DC. After years of trying to educate, enforce and change our attitude about the effe...
Read full storyGovernment release 'Why Factor'
Following the controversy over the appeal and release of the 'Lockerbie Bomber' on compassionate grounds and his subsequent return to Libya; the government has announced the setting up of an expert panel to review future cases.And in an unprecedented...
Read full storySuccess Of 'Slum' Films Inspires New UK Blockbuster!
Buoyed by the success of recent films such as 'Slumdog Millionaire' and the recently released South African movie, 'District 9', set in a Soweto township, British film company Gravy Train Productions are planning to release what they hope will be a s...
Read full storyCrash, Bang, Wallop What A Video.
A graphic video depicting the human cost of texting while driving has gathered overwhelming praise. The video which has an age limit on YouTube quickly became a viral video on thousands of websites and blogs in the UK and internationally. The v...
Read full storyMegan Fox is a Transformer?
Actress Megan Fox coming directly from her role in Transformers told several tabloids, including The National Inquisitioner that she herself sometimes feels like a transformer. "I'm afraid I might become another Marilyn Monroe case I could end up...
Read full storyFSA Warns against "Spoofing"
LONDON (Monthly Cycle) - The Financial Services Authority said on Tuesday it will fine,suspend or kill operators involved in the practice known as "spoofing". The warning follows a 35,000 pound fine imposed last year by the UK Regulator on an Esto...
Read full storySwede Arrested Following Allegation Of Sex Roast
Police yesterday swooped on the home of professional widower and, now confirmed, contestant in this year's "I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of This!", Jock Swede, following claims that he and a pal were involved in a sexual "roast" assault upon a pennile...
Read full storyWhen shit happens... Home Insurers say "No More!"
Insurance companies are taking decisive action against increasing claims against property damage which, they say, could easily be avoided by not buying 'at risk' properties in the first place. In guidelines published today, the national governing...
Read full storySimon Cowell Opens Up About Paula Abdul
LOS ANGELES, CA - Simon Cowell said in an interview today that the chemistry is different now between judges with even-less-talented former Spice Girl Victoria "Posh" Beckham guest-judging America's Got Idols in the absence of Paula Abdul. "It's l...
Read full storyThe Chupacabra Sold To Mexico
SAN ANTONIO - The Figginfacker family of Blank Check City, Texas, owners of the Chupacabra has just informed Oprah Winfrey that they have finalized the sale of the Chupacabra to the Republic of Mexico. The amount of the sale is not being released...
Read full storyObama Chanelling Michael Jackson?
Washington, DC: In a disturbing development a source close to the White House has claimed that President Obama is 'channelling' Michael Jackson. My source reports that in recent days Obama has been spotted 'moonwalking' and grabbing his crotch ra...
Read full storyRobert Pattinson Finally Admits To "Vitamingate"
LONDON - Robert Pattinson, actor, model, singer, and part-time crumpets taster has admitted to BBC's Louella Buckinghamshire that he has been successfully treated for an addiction to vitamin pills. Pattinson said that he first started taking vitam...
Read full storySpoof Writer Admits to Foot Fetish
Spoof writer Buckwheatsbutt has just openly admitted to a sexual fantasy. He has a foot fetish. Buck is not into licking toes or painting toenails. Instead, he likes insteps. In fact, the writer recently announced that he plans to kill off his...
Read full storyDog days in the White House: Bo's Journal - Entry 5
Holy Beggin Strips! The White House has turned into a shit house of confusion, and we have Joe Biden taking over since Barry has embarked on his 'endless vacation', apparently in a fit of pique! There is a sense of panic all around me as Joe has given 3 public addresses discussing how 'he' is on top of the tarp funds and leading the health care crusade, adopting the Ted Kennedy mantle! Wow...h...
Read full storyObama Misunderstands Insult From Mexican Ambassador
President Barack Obama met today with Ambassadors from several North, Central, and South American countries. As they were lining up for the lunch buffet, Obama stepped in front of Mexican Ambassador to the United States Jose Luis Lopez Guadalupe de...
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