Prince Harry and Prince William in Horseback Crusade Training
Heroic Harry of Wales and his brother Billy Wales were yesterday at the Beafort Polo Club, Gloucestershire for the latest training session for the crusade to Jerusalem of 2013. It is thought the two brothers had met up for Harry to catch up on Billy&...
Read full storyThe Love Guru misses it by 'That Much' at the box office!
(La La Land, CA) - Proving that it takes more than bad wigs and 400 dick jokes to lure an audience, Mike Myers return to the big screen with The Love Guru barely drew enough people to fill a medium sized Ashram. Steve Carell's
Read full storyTexans Increasingly Victims of Raid Rage
Over 2000 federal troops, and law enforcement officers from all over Texas, and parts of Oklahoma and Louisiana stormed The Lakewood Church of Houston Sunday during worship services and arrested the entire congregation of over 26000 members. The acti...
Read full storyFamous Renaissance artist 'hid secret code in Hellfire Chapel'
Rome - (Satanic Mess): Renowned sixteenth century Renaissance painter Micheldiabolo hid a secret code in the Pisstine Chapel murals predicting the rise of Hitler's Pope Pius XII according to a new book.
Read full storyImmigrants Put On Boat
Hundreds of immigrants were rounded up earlier today and put on board a boat. In a controversial move Home Secretary Jacqui Smith said "In order to celebrate 60 years since they arrived we want to send them back".
Read full storyLewis Hamilton and Tiger Woods Are Twins Separated At Birth
There was a surprise for motor racing and golf fans alike today, when it was revealed that Lewis Hamilton, the Formula 1 racing driver, and golfer Tiger Woods are twin brothers.
Read full storyNew Messiah Is Black
Worshippers at the Ewood Cathedral, Lancashire, woke up this morning to find a new messiah has been appointed and will soon be coming to live and work amongst the dark satanic mills. A new messiah has widely been predicted for the area since the last...
Read full storyRon Paul Chosen to Moderate MSNBC'S "Meet the Press"
Today, NBC executives chose former Republican Presidential candidate Ron Paul to be the new moderator of "Meet the Press."...
Read full storyScottish citizens re-named as 'residents'
In a surprise move today, 5 million Scots were changed from being 'citizens' to 'residents'. Speaking from his cave near Stirling, Robert 'the Bruce' Bruce said: 'Scotland is a sovereign nation, as is England, I wish idiots would stop speaking abo...
Read full storyFew crude refinements at OPEC snake-oil summit
Jeddah, Saudi Arabia - (Ass Mess): Political leaders at the Organization of Petroleum Jelly Exporting Countries summit had a right laugh this afternoon.
Read full storyBrush Stroke!
A fifty-eight year old man died yesterday after choking while laughing at a television show.
Read full storyAmish Rename Intercourse
Intercourse PA -- The Pennsylvania Dutch (Amish) will change the name of the town Intercourse after a recent discovery.
Read full storyBostrum Good at Moaning!
The actor and person Arthur Bostrum arrived in court today accused of common assault after a man 'annoyed' him at a West-End dronks party.
Read full storyBig Brother's Alex: Officially the thickest woman in the world
Doctors have confirmed that Big Brother's Alex De Gale is officially the thickest woman in the world. The sad, desperate contestant, who likes to call everyone else stupid, begins almost every sentence with the hackneyed phrase "At the end of the...
Read full storyPresident Bush's dentist moves to new location
As is well known, the current administration has been seeking a definitive solution for our high price of crude oil. In a unique move to expedite a plan to increase the supply of oil for the United States, President Bush has asked American citizenry...
Read full storyMcCain's Tough Talk on Energy
Energy markets were rocked, and oil prices soared to a record $143.75 per barrel today following comments by John McCain in answer to why the current administration's energy policy had failed so miserably, and how his would succeed.
Read full storyObama Screws Up On Road With Locals: Election Nightmare Ahead?
The Democratic Party's Presidential candidate, Barack Obama, is making several whirlwind tours of key U.S. towns and cities to pick up votes cast for Hillary Clinton in the primaries.
Read full storyAbomination or Obama-Nation - Presidential Race to Decide
Washington - Democrats say that to elect McCain after George Bush would be an Abomination. Republicans counter that to elect Obama would cause the US to become an Obama-Nation. US voters are confused. What started o...
Read full story'Scottish Islamic state' plotted
Secret plans to set up an Islamic state in Scotland were planned by 2 jihad supporters, a court heard today. Imran Unis and Waqar Khan said that the only problem was a lack of weapons, and then they would take on 'non-believers, once and for all.
Read full storyEpileptics Throw a Fit Over Tunbridge Wells Decision
(Tunbridge Wells, England) - The Tunbridge Wells Borough Council has finally provided proof to the world that too much time on your hands will drive you completely batty. In a memo sent to city workers, the council has instructed all employees to us...
Read full storyJohn McCain Praises His Opposition to Flood Prevention Programs
WASHINGTON (FMLiveWire) -- With dozens of communities in the US Midwest still under water from failed levees, Democrat Barack Obama has criticized Republican John McCain for opposing federal spending on flood prevention programs.
Read full storyFind A Final Holiday Solution In Croatia
Today Croatia was offering cheap holidays again, and visitors can stay in the cities of Dubrovnik and Split for as little as £22 ($89) a week. Croatia has long been seen as a popular destination for Germans and Austrians, and Argentinians, and off...
Read full storyGordon Ramsey, again
Sweary footballing Chef, Gordon Ramsey is the latest celeb to feature on Neighbours.
Read full story"Ronaldo to Become MP"
Ronaldo, the Portuguese football star, is close to signing for New Labour, insiders claimed last night.
Read full story"MPs are not greedy bastards" shock claim
"Britain's MPs are not greedy bastards only interested in trousering large amounts of cash". So said Sir Phil Yourown-Boots, Tory MP for Windsor.
Read full storyZimbabwe Election Results In One Week Early
There was no repeat of the debacle in the first Zimbabwe election today, as the result of the run-off between Robert Mugabe's Zanu PF party and the opposition MDC party of Morgan Tsvangirai, was announced one week ahead of schedule. The voting, wh...
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