Bush on Gay Marriage: I Believe in Dick
President George W. Bush weighed in today on the issue of gay marriage. Speaking from the Oval Office in response to the Mayor of San Francisco's allowing weddings between same sex couples to be performed, President Bush stated "I am deeply troubled...
Read full storySatan Says: "Sin Away" Your Souls are Safe; Hell is Filled to the top!
A collective sigh of relief was experienced by the world's faithful Tuesday when The Devil told a group of Christians gathered for a religious symposium in New Orleans that Hell is overflowing -- the Ten Commandments are null and void-- And, in t...
Read full storyGibson's 'Passion' Subliminal Nazi Propaganda
Hollywood, CA -- Critical analysis of Mel Gibson's new controversial movie has revealed subliminal images and messages peppered throughout the flick. And they're not designed to influence your snack purchase or next movie choice, they're...
Read full storyGeorge W. to utilize flamboyant image consultants
In an effort to more closely convey a persona of leadership, President Bush announced today his plans to work with famed image consultants from the popular TV phenomenon, Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.
Read full storyRichard and Judy to present next year's Brit Awards
The prestigious Brit Music Awards' so-called controversial image has received a kick in the teeth, with the news that ITV schedulers have relegated next year's event to daytime television.
Read full storyMusic Industry Giggling Over Static Loaded MP3 Crusade
"It's like your listening... your listening... SHSHSHSHHSHSHSHSHH!!!! Ha ha ha ha ha..." said Harvey Finglebert, head of the RIAA's new 1, 2, MP3 Faux department said.
Read full storyMedical Breakthrough: Breathing Causes Cancer
Stockholm, Sweden --- Swedish researchers have just discovered that breathing can cause cancer. This brings the list of things that cause cancer up to 1,234,567.
Read full storyWhat Kind Of Terrorist Are You?: A Quiz
Suffering from an identity crisis? Not sure where you fit in in today's changing political climate? Take this quiz and you'll know: What kind of terrorist are you?...
Read full storyJason Fallstetler Wins Wisconsin Primary
Yesterday's democratic primary proved that cheese isn't the only thing growing in Wisconsin. As the votes were tallied and the major networks began to report, it became evident that this race is far from over. In a quiet suburb south of Milwaukee the...
Read full storyThe Queen Stages Raunchy Janet Jackson Routine
Last night's prestigious Brit Awards Ceremony was brought to a standstill when Her Majesty the Queen staged a raunchy ‘Janet Jackson' routine with her Greek-born husband.
Read full storyCBS Reveals Truth About "Raymond"
In a statement issued by CBS Broadcasting today, the studio admitted that earlier assertions that everybody loves Raymond may have been fictitious. According to insider sources, the sudden turnaround occurred after one of the show's major advert...
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