BILLINGSGATE POST: Life is a shell game with but one predictable outcome; you’re gonna get screwed in the end. What we see isn’t necessarily what’s happening. In time and space there are unlimited variations of reality. To cope with this, Modern S…
BILLINGSGATE POST: It’s been awhile since Carlos Danger, also known as Anthony Weiner, has been front page news in the tabloids and cable news. For a time, it was too hard for Weiner to stop sending pictures of his penis to girls he met on the…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Those beady eyes that peered back at President Trump from the mirror when he adjusted his albino raccoon hairpiece missed nothing. The gift from Vladimir Putin to Trump was a stealth bomb. If it got into the wrong hands, it could b…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Like Joe Biden, Tulza Tuzon, also known as Haf-and-Haf, was once a handsome man with a full head of hair and a toothy smile. An accident resulted in the left side of his face becoming disfigured. Like all of Dick Tracy’s villains,…
BILLINGSGATE POST: California, best known for its over abundance of fruits, nuts and vegetables, has now mandated that all residents over 6 years of age must stuff cigarette filters up their noses to prevent the spread of COVID. While most of the…
BILLINGSGATE POST: In the Beginning, there were but two widgets: A(Adam) and E(Eve). With their standardized plumbing functioning smoothly, this configuration was passed down through the evolutionary process for millenniums. Possibly too effective,…
BILLINGSGATE POST: It is beyond irony that a member of the committee investigating UFOs has been accused of being a space alien himself. Appearing before the first congressional public hearing on UFOs in a decade, Elmer Smuckmeister dropped a bom…
BILLINGSGATE POST: The convoluted efforts of the FBI to unravel the origins of the Steele Dossier have taken another twist. Frustrated because they fell for the outrageous story that two Russian hookers unloaded their bladders on Donald Trump’s ho…
BILLINGSGATE POST: President Biden came under fire today for choosing Nina Jankowicz to lead the Department of Homeland Security’s Disinformation Governance Board, completely overlooking Dr. Viscount Billingsgate for the job. While admitting that…
BILLINGSGATE POST: If you have ever wondered who is calling the shots for President Joe Biden, look no further. Billionaire George Soros, a man with no country, is the defacto leader of our country. Along with Barack Obama’s former puppeteer, Valeri…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Until now, all the efforts of man to restore the skin of his fellow creature to its natural form and beauty, have proved fruitless. Previous attempts by taxidermists to stuff and mount a member of his own specie have only produced…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Who’s calling the shots? President Biden seemingly was in full control of the White House’s Easter egg roll when he was interrupted by none other than the Easter Bunny. No. It wasn’t really an Easter Bunny. It was a staffer dre…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Forget the miles and miles of lizard-killing solar energy panels that spoil our great outdoors. Forget the ubiquitous windmills that dot our prairies and seas. Forget the promising use of hydrogen fuel to run our engines; likewis…
BILLINGSGATE POST: On August 30, 1963, John F. Kennedy became the first U.S. president to have a direct phone line to the Kremlin in Moscow. The “hotline” was designed to facilitate communication between the president and Soviet premier so that one…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Not since John Wayne suddenly changed his mind in the movie, McClintock!, has there been such a reversal of course versus one’s initial statement. When President Biden went off-script by suggesting that Vladimir Putin lose his…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Like a latter-day Cleghorn Leghorn, Joe Biden blustered into the Democrat chicken coop and picked a chick that had been handed down from one rooster to another for twenty years. Even Donald Duck had a run with her. He loved her c…
BILLINGSGATE POST: Joseph Stalin, Adolf Hitler, Pol Pot; all had something in common: Each sang in the church choir before becoming tyrants who launched war on their people, killing millions before being swept into the dustbin of history. Now Vladim…
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