MOSCOW – (World Satire) – The Kremlin Voice has finally decided to issue a statement regarding President Putin's alleged affair with Melania Trump.
The KV stated emphatically in an editorial that the rampant rumors that have been floating all over Russia, Europe, America, and even New Zealand about an affair between Putin and Melania Trump are not true.
Putin reportedly has admitted that yes, he and Melania have recently become very close friends, and they do text at least 4 or 7 times daily.
But they are just, as the Russian dictator stated, “Texting Buddies.”
Melania did inform Anderson Cooper that Vlady has the cutest smile she has seen in years.
Melly also noted that comparing the physique of her husband Donaldo, with the physique of Vladymir is like comparing a fucking tricycle to a Harley Davidson motorcycle.
SIDENOTE: Mrs. Trump confided to her BFF Meghan Markle that Vlady’s peckerski (dick) unlike Donaldo's actually works.
