Fung Ho has sold panda meat at the Nanchong exotic market every day for the last 30 years. But recently he has found that customers are avoiding his delicacies.
"Ever since colonavilus, nobody want buy panda," said Fung. "I have panda flesh, flesh daily. Evelybody like loast panda. Mmm so tasty. Put it in your soup or buy a whole head for your glandmother."
Chinese customers have been avoiding eating unusual meats because they believe it could cause another pandemic. Fung began enquiring about Western markets to see if he could export panda meat to countries bored of eating plain food during lockdown.
"We could serr a rot to Blitain," said Fung hopefully. "Peopre there so fat they rook rike panda."
However, it turned out that the Fung Ho's contact in the UK was actually a tabloid journalist conducting a "sting" operation to catch him red-handed. As a result, Fung Ho was imprisoned and has not been heard of since.
Chinese ambassador Geoff Chong said, "This so steleotypical. One stupid idiot tly to serr panda meat and you assume all Chinamen eat panda for bleakfast, runch and dinner."
"You plobabry make cheap joke about how we arways confuse retter l and r as well. Such razy steleotype. Stop raughing at China. We no eat panda. Not any more anyway."