Man Just Wondered If It Was Worth Ordering Anything From Amazon, At This Late Stage

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 25 March 2020

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You never know what's just around the corner/corona/coroner

A man who was thinking of ordering some medical face masks from an online supplier on Amazon, hesitated at the last moment when it occurred to him he might die before they arrived.

Moys Kenwood, 56, has been pacing around his house for nine days, since the school he works at shut down due to the threat posed by some 'virus' or other. He walks around, goes upstairs, comes down, goes outside into the garden for a saunter around, then comes back inside again.

This morning, he hit upon the splendid idea of ordering some face masks, now that the virus is beginning to get the upper hand.

He quickly found some available at a reasonable price on, and was about to place an order, when it crossed his mind that he might expire before the items arrived.

He dithered. His finger hovered over the mouse, with the cursor on the 'Add to basket' button. Time stood still. Different scenarios flashed through his mind: add to basket, money, a hospital, a patient in bed, a package, a postman, doctors, face masks, a coffin being lowered into a grave.

His wife came into the room:

"Did you see any face masks?"

"No," he replied, "I'll see what happens tomorrow."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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