President Trump Says Woman Is Not His Typist

Written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 25 June 2019

image for President Trump Says Woman Is Not His Typist
Some of Trump's former typists - sorry about the cropping tool

President Donald Trump has gone on record to officially announce that the woman accusing him of sexual misconduct is not his typist.

E. Jean Carroll has accused Mr. Trump of lunging at her in the changing room of the Bergdorf Goodman department store when she modeled some underwear for him in 1995 or 1996. Trump denies this, OK? OK?

The president held a special press conference to deal with this specially-fabricated piece of fake news, and said that you could tell it was fake news because it put him in a bad light, and everyone knows he's a good person.

He said:

"Firstly, I want to say that this woman is lying. She is not my typist. I don't have a typist. I type every thing my self.

Ms Carroll is the 16th woman to allege sexual misconduct against Mr. Trump.

That is not a typing error.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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