In a last-ditch attempt to modify his behavior, and curb his violent nature, President Trump will undergo 'Aversion Therapy' of the kind young hoodlum Alex underwent in Stanley Kubrick's 1971 film 'A Clockwork Orange'.
Even before his threat yesterday that Iran would face "obliteration" were it to enter into a conflict with the US, Trump's big mouth had already caused plenty of bother elsewhere.
As well as upsetting plenty of his American compatriots, North Korea, Mexico, France, China, and even Great Britain have also felt the lash of his tongue and fingertips, as he madly tweets away his every notion.
After a course of trepanning failed to solve the problem two weeks ago, senior White House aides have decided upon the extreme mind-altering process of Aversion Therapy, in which a subject is injected with nausea-inducing drugs, strapped into a chair in a deserted cinema, and made to watch hour upon hour of split-second video images of sex, pain, gore, violence, and depraved acts.
The subject has his eyelids pincered open for the duration. Blinking is impossible.
It's not known whether the therapy will have the same effect it had on young Alex in 'A Clockwork Orange', but an unnamed White House droog said:
"Nothing has so far worked with this dipshit, but we can't give up trying. His 'button finger' is getting real itchy."
