Written by Aspartame Boy

Tuesday, 24 April 2018

image for Airports relabeling “Animal Relief Areas”
Don’t believe Samir. He groped me.

UN, New York, NY - Samir Braseer Alahumpidad, chairman of UNFART (United Nations Flying Animal Relief Travelers), held a press conference behind the UN building today at noon, holding the leash of his companion support dog as it relieved itself on the sidewalk.

There he explained that new signage would be employed worldwide in airports to assist those traveling with animals that need to relieve themselves.

He explained that too many animals were being molested by those that mistook the signs to mean they themselves could be relieved by means of an animal.

This has led to some very unpleasant scenes involving, goats, dogs, cats, and even some pet rodents.

From now on the signs will clearly state:

Animal Crapping Zone

It is too early to tell for sure, but this is hoped to cut down on the number of animal abuse incidents.

For further information, please contact the SPCA and your psychiatrist. Tell him you read all the to the end of this story and need help urgently.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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