ALLIGATOR NUTS, Florida – (Satire News) – The high-ranking Republican party powers-that-be are having fits at the thought that two very staunch red states could flip over and become blue (Democratic) states.
Life long GOPer Percy Oniontree, 43, says that thanks to the racist, pussy-grabbing, tax evading Trumptard, millions of Republicans will either not vote Republican or else they’ll vote for Democratic candidates.
He pointed out that he fears that Florida and North Carolina will become so blue they’ll make a bluebird look like a raven.
Meanwhile Sen. Mitch (The Bullfrog) McConnell says that he puts all of the fucking blame on that lying, arrogant, sarcastic, orange complected bully, Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump. ■
