Mexico's El Ole News Agency reports that a burro herder, who was deeply engrossed in digging a hole, stumbled upon something so dazzling in the dirt that it nearly blinded him with shock and amazement. The sun glinted off the object, casting a gol…
FUJINOMIYA, Japan - (Satire News) - Japan's Saki News Agency has just reported that the last time that Mount Fuji erupted was on December 16, 1707, at 4:25 in the morning. The volcano which was named after the very popular Japanese alcoholic bever…
HOUSTON - (Satire News) - NASA has just made an amazing announcement. Planet experts have revealed that tests show that Labia Majora (the planet) is made up of 43% gold. A NASA spokesperson stated that the discovery was made after the US planet ro…
MAR-a-LAGO – (Satire News) – Reports coming from The Daily Dirt News Agency state that a dozen agents from the FBI conducted a pre-dawn raid on Trump’s Dixieland mansion, Mar-a-Lago. The Federal officers confiscated over 27 computers, lap tops, iP…
KNOXVILLE, Tennessee – (Satire News) – Knoxville’s PBS affiliate is reporting that the vice-assistant director of Fort Knox has revealed that there are 89 ten-ounce gold bars missing from the high-security building. When asked what the total value…
Men claimed they were the superior sex since Adam blamed Eve for tempting him with the apple. God, the landlord of the universe, also a guy (and guys stick together like ink on newsprint) bought it. So women were designated as the weaker sex. Som…
The president signed an executive order today stating that: "The entire structure of the White House, including floors, walls, and ceilings, shall be 100% covered in a 1' thick coating of pure 24 carat gold. Furthermore all chairs, tables, furnit...
Olaf Soxoff, a German-Swiss skier has alerted the world to an incredible find. An experienced veteran of the piste, the sixty-three years old Olaf decided to try an unfamiliar route on the South side of Switzerland's highest mountain, the Matterhorn.
Gotfried Right was today jailed for life at a ground-breaking trial in the Superior Court of San Francisco. Gotfried, a professor of graphic design at the Academy of Art had set up a printing press in his garage and proceeded to print what the prosec...
Eldorado, Texas - Workmen from the Texas Department of Public Safety were seen deploying ground-penetrating radar equipment today in what looked like a recce mission to scan the ranch's 1,600 acres sequestered from convicted polygamist pervert Warren...
A California couple who found a six cans of buried gold coins, perhaps valued at $10 million (USD) may not be so lucky in the end. The US Department of 'We Own it All' (USDWOA) has connected this stash to a theft that took place wayyy back in 1900...
A group of 1000 leprechauns will boycott the Six Nations Ireland/England rugby match on Saturday. The leprechauns who have to be painted green to remain visible, are said to be sick and tired of "fairy taleist" abuse from crowds at home and away spor...
FORT KNOX, KENTUCKY - Federal Officials announced today their determination that gold and silver are worthless commodities which are taking up valuable space in homes and offices across the U.S. Fort Knox Director, Peabody Atkins, explained, "The...
Washington, D.C. - A top secret military operation authorized by the Pentagon has been leaked to the press today by a source calling himself "King Midas". King Midas reports that the U.S. military has been given orders to begin clandestine searc...
CHICAGO - Tiger Woods flew into the Windy City to attend a new golf products convention. He told sports reporters that he had come across a terrific golf club that is excellent for hitting the ball out of a sand trap. The 38-year-old Woods said...
HOUSTON - The people at the National Aeronautics and Space Administration are jumping for joy at the recent discovery made by the Martian land rover Curiosity. Trent Timmelfarb, the official spokesperson for NASA, has informed the news media that...
HOUSTON - NASA is reporting that its Mars land rover, Curiosity has just made an amazing discovery. It has sent back video that shows a field of gold that is completely covered with gold nuggets. NASA scientists say that the gold field is the s...
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