The FBI Rules That Trump Will No Longer Be Allowed To Peddle His Totally Baseless, Unsubstantiated Conspiracy Theories

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 2 July 2021

image for The FBI Rules That Trump Will No Longer Be Allowed To Peddle His Totally Baseless, Unsubstantiated Conspiracy Theories
Trump recently confided to Tucker Carlson off the record that Hope Hicks is the best kisser he's ever kissed.

WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - The FBI has just informed the former one-term president that he has been officially prohibited from further peddling his ridiculously unsubstantiated, conspiracy theories.

And of course the “Man Baby,” reacted like one would expect an immature, spoiled rotten brat to react. He began pointing his finger at everyone from Nancy Pelosi to Jim Acosta, and Kathy Griffin to Paul McCartney.

He then caught his breath and he also blamed President Obama, who he said was also responsible for the sinking of the Titanic, the Massacre at The Little Big Horn, and Eve eating that damn apple.

A source close to Trump reported that Melania "Be Best" Trump was extremely embarrassed and apparently has been after her hamburger-eating husband to seek professional help before he goes over the edge and ends up shooting one of his two older sons with a bow and arrow.

Boom Boom News confirmed that the Mescalero Apache bow and arrow set was a gift from Hope Hicks, who allegedly is still old 'Orange Balls' number 1 girlfriend.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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