Every Presidential Poll Shows That President Trump’s Ass is Toast

Funny story written by Fannin Fabriano

Tuesday, 3 November 2020

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Trump is alleging that most of the political polls are funded by Bill and Hillary Clinton.

NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) – Most of the reputable US political polls are showing that President Trump’s ass is toast, to use a popular southern cooking term.

The Quintessential Poll, one of the most reputable polls n the nation, is going as far as to state that former White House press secretary Sarah “Tubby” Huckabee has a better chance of becoming anorexic than Trump has of being re-elected.

Meanwhile, Trump’s personal attorney, Bill “The Pill” Barr, is investigating an allegation that Amazon owner, Jeff Bezos, reportedly told all of his 27 million employees that, if they vote for Biden, he will give each one a $5,000 Christmas bonus.

One long time Amazon employee reportedly said, “Hell, for $5,000, I’d even vote for Biden over my grandmother, a 300-pound woman who raised me and my nine siblings, all by herself.”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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