TALLAHASSEE, Florida – The young folks in the Plywood State said that they needed to have their suntans, and now thousands of them have much more than just darker skin.
The Sunshine State Federation of Doctors told Governor Ron DeSantis that he needed to close every beach in Florida, but “Old Stubborn Butt” said not to worry, because the wind would carry the germs off to Alabama.
The infamous Coronavirus Beach, formerly Ponce de Leon Beach, alone reported a total of 3,801 new C-19 cases, including a female soccer team of 17 women, who had driven down from Battle Creek, Michigan.
At first, DeSantis had tried to use terms that President Trump has coined like hoax, witch hunt, boobs, collusion, loser, and fake, but after he was hit by three tomatoes, he changed his tune.
The Republican governor admitted that he was too busy playing golf and drinking bottles of Corona Extra Beer, to worry about C-45, as Nancy Pelosi now calls the Coronavirus pandemic.
When asked by the local media what he plans on doing, he stated that Trump has invited him to go down to Mar-a-Lago and play golf, in order to get away from all of this depressing Coronavirus news.