WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Trump just made tens of millions of Democrats happy as hell.
"The Orange Mess" has just announced that he will be starting up his MAGA campaign rallies in Tulsa, Oklahoma at the Sooner or Later Arena.
Trump, who has been feeling totally depressed since his approval number is now down around 3%, says that his base needs to see him in person so that he can shake as many hands and grab as many female you-know-what’s as he possibly can.
A rally organizer has said that bleach will be provided upon request.
The “Liar-in-Chief” added that no Blacks will be allowed into the MAGA pep rallies, unless their names are Ben “Uncle Tom” Carson, ex-Milwaukee Sheriff David “Uncle Tom” Clarke, Kanye “Uncle Tom” West, or those two butt ugly sisters Diamond & Silk (aka the two Aunt Tomasinas).
When asked if he is requiring the audience to wear masks, POTUS replied, “Hell no, these are all dyed-in-the-wool GOPers and everyone knows that Republicans are all immune to getting the Coronavirus.”