BILLINGSGATE POST: On January 15, 2019, the only man in the world with a tattoo of Richard Nixon on his back, was apprehended by a FBI Swat Team in the early morning hours at his home in Florida.
Newly-revealed TOP SECRET documents decoded by BILLINGSGATE POST crack investigative reporter, Detrick “Dirty Trick” Detwiler, underlined the risks associated with this operation.
It was well known to both the FBI and CIA that Roger Stone's Yorkie, Bianca, if unleashed, could raise havoc with the operation. To counter that threat, the FBI Swat Team was prepared to blow his door down with a M-1A2C Abrams tank, which carries armor penetrating shells capable of going through twelve inches of tempered steel like a hot knife going through butter.
Also revealed in the documents, was that a nuclear attack submarine was off the coast of Florida with Tomahawk Missiles at the ready. If Bianca ran amok and attacked an ill-prepared swat team, heads could roll. Although all were wearing full combat gear with night vision googles, nothing could have prepared them for this dangerous mission.
“At the crack of dawn, 29 FBI agents arrived at my home with 17 vehicles, with lights flashing, when they could have contacted my lawyer.” Stone explained after a court appearance, Friday. “I tried to surrender, but they said they had already ordered the missile strike.”
When Roger Stone stepped out of the rubble of his house wearing Bunny pajamas, and cradling little Bianca in his arms, a collective sigh of relief was expelled by the FBI agents.
Ever the optimist, the pensive Stone added dismissively:
“The FBI agents were extraordinarily courteous when dragging me and my wife through the debris of our destroyed home.”
Dr. Slim: “By damn, anyone with a tattoo of Richard Nixon on his back can’t be all bad.”
Dirty: “Yo, Dr. Dude. What about me? I have a tattoo of Spiro Agnew on my buttocks.”
