The Latest Las Vegas Odds on Trump Getting Re-Elected

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 27 March 2020

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All of the casinos in Vegas have banded together and are asking for a $14.7 billion bailout.

LAS VEGAS – The word from The Land of Odds is out, and it does not look very good for Old Man Trump in his bid to win a second term.

National Focus Magazine is reporting that, it is no secret that businessman Trump being president makes about as much sense as a Pike’s Peak mountain goat entering The Miss America pageant.

NFM’s Durango Tucker said that his magazine reported that 95% of the Las Vegas oddsmakers give Trump a slim-to-none chance of being elected to a second term.

Tucker pointed out that he has personally heard that members of the president’s base are in such dire need of money, that many plan to, not only vote against him, but also bet against him.

One such individual, Hank “Maga Boy” Pittberger, said, “Hell, I done lost my tractor, my tiller, my combine, my wife, and 18 of my 21 chickens because of the goofy-looking peckerwood.”

Hank remarked, “So, I just done went and borrowed 80 bucks from Grandpappy Otis, and I’m agonna bet it all against ‘Dufus Don.’”

The current Las Vegas odds on POTUS getting re-elected are 17-2.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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