WASHINGTON D.C. - A close friend of the first lady, Melania Trump, informed a reporter with Ipso Facto Illustrated Magazine that Melania has been feeling quite depressed of late.
The unnamed woman, who we'll call Tangerine Sankamino, said that she has known Melania ever since they met at a benefit for the underprivileged children of the White House staff members, back in September 2017.
Miss Sankamino told reporter Sigmund Cottonseed that Mrs. Trump is sick and tired of hearing her husband mention the phrase 'witch hunt', which POTUS does an average of 13 times a day. She added that, one day, Donald Johnny even uttered the phrase when he and Melania were in bed doing the whoop-de-do.
Cottonseed noted that Miss Sankamino is a Democrat, but that the first lady has lied to the president and told him that Tangerine is the proud owner of 3 red MAGA hats, a pair of MAGA Daisy Duke short shorts, and an AR-15 semi-automatic assault rifle.
IN CLOSING - Senator Lindsey Graham is denying the rumor that his favorite color is pink.