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Funny story: Theologian Comes Up with Brilliant New Rationalization for Why God Doesn't Answer Prayers

Theologian Comes Up with Brilliant New Rationalization for Why God Doesn't Answer Prayers

To the relief of many determined to believe in God, despite the lack of evidence of any participatory deity who intervenes in any noticeable way in the workings of the human world, Christian theologian Dr. Mortimer Lane of Nashville, Tennessee, has o...

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Funny story: Trump Administration Plagued by Technical Difficulties; Prayerful Vice President Remains Cool Under Pressure

Trump Administration Plagued by Technical Difficulties; Prayerful Vice President Remains Cool Under Pressure

Rumors are flying that, due to a number of mysterious technical difficulties, the Trump administration has lost the computer file containing the engineering design plans for President Trump’s proposed border wall. Many predict that if the missing fil...

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Funny story: Christian Youth Group Forms Prayer Circle Around Tornado. Banishes It To Hell.

Christian Youth Group Forms Prayer Circle Around Tornado. Banishes It To Hell.

Bentleyville, USA (AP)- Al Roker never predicted a rapturous burst of the power of prayer in his weekend forecast. The Child Soldiers For Christ youth group had assembled at their regular "divine debriefing" Sunday morning service when a loud nois...

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Funny story: Model prayer for all occasions discovered in Kansas

Model prayer for all occasions discovered in Kansas

The Green Cathedral, Harrisburg, Kansas The Honorable Crowley Smitherson, asst. Minister From the Pulpit, Dear Friends, We've all had to enter the new modern age and leave behind some cherished ideas. One is prayer. We aren't giving up on prayer yet. But, in the interim, we are standardizing the prayers we use. We have decided to eliminate all prayers in favor of one brief, standardized...

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Funny story: Don't be afraid to pray to the Holy Spirit

Don't be afraid to pray to the Holy Spirit

May 31, 2015 3 minutes after Vespers Written on my iPhone Sent by email to the website, "PrayersGalore.universe Dear Holy Spirit, Yesterday I prayed to Jesus, God, Mary, St. Dominick the thin, Mother Doris,and Nun Kolodnic. I asked for wisdom, guidance, truth, clarity, and a bagel with cream cheese. I hope you are not offended that I didn't include you in my prayers. It wasn't an...

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Funny story: Can God, Rain Dancers Stop Dust Bowl In California?

Can God, Rain Dancers Stop Dust Bowl In California?

TULARE, calif. -- California is facing its worst draught in history. It is forcing farmers there to leave idle thousands of acres of fields in the state that supplies almost half of the nation's fruits and vegetables. It has also left 17 rural towns...

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Funny story: Praying "Real Hard" Really Works!

Praying "Real Hard" Really Works!

A new study shows that the effort you put into your prayers counts heavily on whether they actually come true! This potential religious/societal breakthrough is reported after a five-month trial in which thirty people were asked to pray as hard as...

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Funny story: God: "I'm Tired of Same Old Prayers"

God: "I'm Tired of Same Old Prayers"

In a written statement today, God said He's tired of the "same old prayers" and asks that people come up with some new ones. "If I hear that 'Now I lay me down to sleep,' chestnut one more time, I'm gonna gag," God wrote. On a side note, 67-yea...

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Funny story: Tim Tebow Exchanges Football Field for Pulpit

Tim Tebow Exchanges Football Field for Pulpit

Building on the success of his Easter sermon to 15,000 folks in Texas, football superstar Tebow has made a firm decision to switch careers. "Being a full-time preacher will mean I won't have the problem of having to retire early due to a broken...

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Funny story: Church of England Criticised for New Prayer

Church of England Criticised for New Prayer

The Church of England (CofE) preaches that thinking of oneself is not the way Christians should go about their lives but thinking of others should be done too. When we say our prayers we often pray for forgiveness and state "I", "me", "my", etc which is not generally thinking of others, so a prayer for everyone to enter the Kingdom of God has been criticised for being too considerate towards th...

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Funny story: Prayer Heals Decapitated Monkey

Prayer Heals Decapitated Monkey

Biloxi, MI - In a shocking exhibition of the power of prayer, a decapitated rhesus monkey has miraculously healed completely following a group prayer service. The announcement came during a press conference Monday, October 3rd, 2011 by group of Chris...

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Funny story: Republicans Reveal Low Cost Prayer Based Health Care Plans

Republicans Reveal Low Cost Prayer Based Health Care Plans

Washington DC (AP) Following the lead of Representative Virginia Foxx (Nutjob-NC) who introduced successful legislation to ban any federal education assistance from being used to teach abortion techniques in medical schools, the social conservative a...

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Funny story: Weather-Related Petitionary Prayer Could Cause Environmental Catastrophes, Warn Scientists

Weather-Related Petitionary Prayer Could Cause Environmental Catastrophes, Warn Scientists

Controversy surrounding weather management for the recent British Royal Wedding has reignited debate about the effect of petitionary prayer on global weather systems. London's weather forecast for the Royal Wedding day had been poor. Unofficial Pa...

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Funny story: Army Replaces 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' with 'Don't Pray? Don't Tell'

Army Replaces 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' with 'Don't Pray? Don't Tell'

After receiving the responses to a survey known as the Global Assessment Tool back from scores of soldiers who admit they are atheists, the Army has deemed them spiritually unfit, and is requiring the heathen soldiers to take remedial training to hel...

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Funny story: Louisiana Gets the Almighty Blow-off: Pillar of Fire in Gulf Quotes Pontius Pilate

Louisiana Gets the Almighty Blow-off: Pillar of Fire in Gulf Quotes Pontius Pilate

NEW ORLEANS, Louisiana - Mixing church and state had explosive results when senators in Louisiana designated Sunday as a day of prayer dedicated to "finally putting an end to the disastrous Gulf of Mexico oil spill, for Pete's sake," according to sta...

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Funny story: FEMA Bans Church Prayer in NOLA

FEMA Bans Church Prayer in NOLA

NEWS ORLEANS, LA - If there's one thing Monsignor Foley of the New Orleans diocese can't take, it's telling his parishioners at the Cathedral-Basilica of St. Louis Cathedral, located in the French Quarter, that they can no longer pray during mass.

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Funny story: Gays Not Allowed to Pray in Wisconsin

Gays Not Allowed to Pray in Wisconsin

Milwaukee, WI - A Wisconsin District Court Judge appropriately named Crabb has ruled that there will be no praying on National Prayer Day unless it is done in private. "Whether you are an atheist or a true believer, a heterosexual or a homosexual...

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