Trump and Kim at the DMZ take naked dip together to celebrate friendship

Written by joseph k winter

Sunday, 30 June 2019

image for Trump and Kim at the DMZ take naked dip together to celebrate friendship
The two retired to a feast of ales and large servings of bulgogi following the pool frolic

Guard Dog News has learned Mr. Trump’s recent trip to meet Kim Jong Un in Korea's Demilitarized Zone had its exotic side.

In a surprise development, Mr. Trump stopped off yesterday on the way home from the G20 Summit to visit Mr. Kim.

Mr. Trump said: “We have a great friendship. We liked each other from day one, and that was very important.”

This renewal of their friendship followed an exchange of letters, with Mr. Kim’s pronounced “beautiful” by Trump and Mr. Trump’s “excellent” by Kim.

The official reason for the meeting was to re-start stalled talks from last February when John Bolton arrived with a list of demands.

Kim turned these down, and Mr. Trump "walked,” although with many a tender look backwards toward Mr. Kim.

This time the two met intimately, including a little naked swimming as a “lark,” according to Mr. Trump’s new press secretary, Stephanie Grisham.

They huddled together pool side--but not to compare aspects of their anatomies, at least not primarily, she added.

(Ms. Grisham further elaborated on this matter as “a bit disappointing,” but then again, she said, classical statues of males in Rome are also “on the small side.”)

Guard Dog sources indicate snatches of a conversation pool-side:

Mr. Kim: “We’re such good friends, Donald, why do we have to have all this conflict?”

Mr. Trump: “Yes, Jong Un, I know, I know. And I will be slammed for doing this as a pussy instead of a war-hawk, the way I am with Iran.”

Mr. Kim: “For the ordinary person, if we really are friends, well, friends are not mean to each other, are they? As with all these sanctions you have on us.”

Mr. Trump (sighing): “I know, I know. And friends don’t threaten with nukes and rockets and all that stuff you’ve got hidden away in your mountains. But, you know, you could tell me where they are.”

Mr. Kim: “Well, Donald, I could. But you know there are those in your administration I can’t trust as far as I can throw them.”

Mr. Trump: “But they’re not here this time. I made sure of that. And they may not be part of next time, either.”

Mr. Kim: “Good, good! Shall we go for another paddle around the pool here?”

Mr. Trump: “We could hold hands!”

Ms. Grisham clarified that all photos of this moment would need to remain classified.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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