Adam Schiff calls for investigation of God-gate

Written by joseph k winter

Sunday, 30 June 2019

image for Adam Schiff calls for investigation of God-gate
No comment from Heaven so far

Yesterday, spectators at the Copenhagen Democracy Summit 2019 were startled by a Skype call, supposedly from Mr. Trump.

During a panel discussion, Nick Clegg, Facebook’s Head of Global Affairs, appeared to receive the call.

“No one loves democracy as much as me,” Mr. Trump said, “and that’s why God elected me.”

This development was then explained as a deep-fake video illustrating the dangers of AI impersonating world leaders.

But Mr. Adam Schiff, congressman from California, is not so sure.

Frowning severely, with red face:

“What? I mean, whaaat? The question is, was it really a fake?”

“Or was it a sinister indication of yet another conspiracy to influence the 2016 election?”

So far, Mr. Trump has not denied the sentiments expressed.

Mr. Schiff immediately called for Mr. Mueller to get back on the job investigating election interference in 2016—this time by The Lord Himself.

“If it was wrong for the Russians, then why not also for God? Outside interference, over-riding the will of the people, cannot be tolerated from anybody!”

Mr. Schiff went on to say he wouldn’t be surprised at Mr. Trump’s privately making deals with Heaven in order to get himself surreptitiously placed as the nation’s top executive.

As to what kind of deals: Trump Towers could be donated as eventual places of worship; large flats of cash; and the services of Mr. Kushner as a special divine agent for world peace.

However, the FBI has indicated difficulties in issuing a subpoena to The Divine.

Further, access to Heavenly Records in the time period involved is another problem.

Might some agents, possibly clergy, be used wearing a wire—if they can get through Heaven’s Gate?

Mr. Schiff has said he is too busy at this time for this. But surely volunteers will come forward quickly, due to the honors involved.

Wireless transmission from these agents back to a new Mueller investigation is currently under study by Google technicians.

Mr. Pompeo and Mr. Pence have both offered their services in this quest, but been declined as members of the opposition party.

Mr. Trump has said:

“Look, am I responsible for this video? Of course not. But it seems to me a sort of what do they call it—a doppelganger?”

“The Lord came and bestowed his benevolence right where it belonged!”

“Isn’t what’s happening in the world today, all the improvements I’m making, a strong indication of this?”

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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