Alabama Legalizes Rape

Written by Monkey Woods

Friday, 17 May 2019

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Locks won't faze God

In a landmark ruling that is sure to have a knock-on effect all across the country, and possibly the world, the state of Alabama legislature today passed a new law that makes it now completely legal to have sex with a woman, even if it is against her will, because God wanted it that way.

Initially starting out as a campaign to ban abortion, things got a little carried away when pro-abortion supporters asked the inevitable questions about pregnancies due to overzealous fathers who raped their daughters, and those as a result of women being tied-and-gagged and raped in alleyways, around the backs of seedy bars, at the side of deserted highways, or at truckstops, often by more than one man, and sometimes by as many as ten.

Alabama reacted by introducing the new law which states that "men are free to do with women as they please, because God wanted it that way."

The Republican lawmaker Clyde Chambliss said, “When God creates the miracle of life inside a woman’s womb, it is not our place as human beings to extinguish that life.Whatever the circumstances, God wanted it that way.”

The new law now means that young girls who are raped and made pregnant by their 'fathers' must, by the force of the Law, be made to give birth to the child, because God wanted it that way.

Women were later seen vanishing behind their doors, and heard bolting them shut.

Padlocks are now in high demand.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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