Trump Pardons Fun Lovin' Criminals

Funny story written by Paxton Quigley

Wednesday, 15 May 2019

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Fun Lovin' Criminals "We've never been convicted."

There was consternation in the US legal system today as The White House announced an addition to so-called President Trump's recent flurry of pardons for his reality TV cast of lickspittles, cronies and ne'er-do-wells. The announcement came in Trump's inimitable style in the usual early morning ill-informed stupid misspelt Tweet rant:

"I am fourth with quashing the convictions of these 3 innocent fun lovin' guys from my hometown. They should NEVER have been put in jail. SAD!!!"

The latest recipients of the President's judicial largesse are the Fun Lovin' Criminals, a band from Trump's native New York City. Their musical style is eclectic, covering styles such as hip hop, rock, blues, jazz, R&B, punk, and funk. They are best known for their hit "Scooby Snacks".

Vocalist and spokesman for the band, Huey Morgan, spoke to The Spoof:

"Hey, dude, we don't know what the fuck's going on in that fuckin' idiot's mind. We've never been convicted of anything."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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