Your mate Dave now has a beard

Funny story written by Ben Macnair

Friday, 21 May 2021

image for Your mate Dave now has a beard
Dave and his beard

Your old mate Dave, now has a beard. You haven't seen him since before the first lockdown, and at first, you didn't know it was him until he shouted at you across the street, and you recognised his voice.

It really suits him.

Dave takes up the story 'It happens all of the time really. I see someone on the street, shout across at them, and they get a really scared, startled look about them until they know it is me. No one has yet commented on the beard'.

Another one of Dave's Mates said 'I have never said anything about Dave's beard because it could be purposeful, or the result of laziness, and if you don't know someone well enough to ask, then it is just rude, isn't it?'

Dave continued 'I have been growing this since March 23rd 2020, so it is purposeful. Of course, I used to tie it as well, and wearing a mask covers it as well, I suppose when things go back to normal, I will have to shave it all of, which is fitting as I am a razor sharpener by trade.'

Shares in Gillette have plummeted since Covid-19 lockdowns, business leaders are hoping for a bounce-back this summer as people's faces start to combust in the heat.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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