DALLAS - (Sports Satire) - Candace "Candy" Nippovich, has been cheering for the Dallas Cowboys for two years.
Her boss Cowboys owner Jerry Jones recently told Sportapalooza Sports writer Pia Confetti, that not only is she one of the prettiest and sexiest of his Rah Rah Girls, but she is also the most sensuously erotic.
Jones noted that if he was not married to Eugenia, he would be all over Candace like paint on a house.
But low and behold, The Watchdog Now News Agency is reporting that Miss Nippovich, is actually a high-ranking spy for the Russian KGB.
Needless to say, Mr. Jerry is in shock. He actually went over to Miss Nippovich's Dallas apartment and informed her that she has been terminated, and he added that he would appreciate it if she would leave the state and move to either Wyoming or Alabama.■
