NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – Word coming out of the Jets hierarchy says that after the team’s dismal (2-14) record last year, the powers-that-be feel that they have to make a drastic change.
Spokesperson Zeke Weatherwine, 91, said that several ideas have been tossed around including moving the team out west, to San Antonio, which is home to three United States air base installations.
Weatherwine, said that there is no city anywhere in America, where the name Jets would be more appropriate than San Antonio, which is also the home of the world-famous Alamo, the most beautiful river walk in the world, George Strait, delicious barbacoa tacos, two members of Led Zeppelin, and the best hamburger in the USA – Whataburger.
Team owner Robert Wood Johnson IV,, has also toyed with the idea of possibly putting their Jets cheerleaders in the skimpiest, lots-of-skin-showing, cheerleading outfits in the entire western hemisphere.
This will definitely bring in more of the 16 to 86-year-old male crowd.
But after Mrs. Johnson put in her very influential two cents, it looks that for now, at least, the Jets are simply going to change their uniform colors from green and white to burnt orange and burnt purple.
SIDENOTE: One of the Jets players, defensive tackle Folorunso Fatukasi, who wears number 94, suggested that the team owner ask NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell to make all of the Jets 16 games, home games.