MIAMI – (Sports Satire) – Miami Dolphins Head Coach Brian Flores says he is thrilled that his quarterback, Tua Tagovailoa, has finally agreed to change his hard-to-pronounce and hard-to-spell last name.
The coach pointed out that Tua's Samoan surname has way too many vowels, and even college professors have trouble pronouncing it.
After the Dolphins lost to the Denver Broncos last week, Tua informed the entire team of his decision to legally change his last name.
They were all so elated, that they got together, and took up a collection, which netted $7,403.17.
Tua said he will use the money to buy Gatorade for the team, along with lipsticks and perfume for the Dolphin cheerleaders.
He added that his new name will now be Tua Football. He explained that he had narrowed the choices down to Dragon, Zippo, and Football.
