NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – Roger Goodell, the commissioner of the NFL, has informed the sports media, that he has had it with all of these playing field bullies that carry on as if they're on a high school campus.
He noted that the latest brawl between the St. Louis Cardinals and the Denver Broncos was the last straw.
Goodell stressed that, from now on, he will be enforcing the new ‘Throw a Punch and You’ll Get Thrown Out of the Game’ rule.
The commissioner further expressed that any player who willingly throws a Gatorade can at one of his opponents will result in the guilty party being expelled from the game.
He went on to say that the perpetrator will also be fined $14,000, and he'll have to pay for the damage to the Gatorade can, as well as for the damage to the liquid contents.
Several teams, including the New York Jets, who are 0-8, and the Pittsburgh Steelers, who are 8-0 are protesting the new ruling.
Jets Coach Adam Gase told Sports Bet Gazette’s Zorro La Bamba, that, if his players want to act like spoiled brats, and spill Gatorade, hot dogs, peanuts, onion rings, or fried Ramen all over the place, that’s their damn business.