The NCAA Has Instructed Ohio State Football Players To Stop Referring to Their School as “THE” Ohio State University

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 19 November 2020

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Ohio State back-up quarterback Wix Atchafalaya says he's devastated by the new NCAA ruling.

NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – In a move that many non-Ohio State fans have been waiting for, for a long, long time, the NCAA powers-that-be have instructed all Ohio State players to stop referring to their college as “THE” Ohio State University.

The collegiate committee’s vote came out 13-0, and they noted that this arrogantly conceited practice will end immediately.

They pointed out that should any player from Ohio State, violate this new directive, the player could risk being expelled from the university, as well as having to return all the stickers on his football helmet.

Two of the Buckeye football players, Brighton Holly (left tackle) and Ignatius Pescadero (kicker) have said that they are going to hire the Cleveland law firm of Lombardo, Quillicy, & Kobayashi, and sue for alienation of compensatory damages, as well as rudimentary malfeasance incognito.

In a non-related story. Venezuela has called off their planned invasion of Costa Rica due to the bullet shortage.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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