WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Sports Satire) – Well the infamous “Play From Behind” Dallas Cowboys have stuck to their new playbook game plan of digging themselves in a hole early in the game and then having to play “Catch-Up.”
Sports Territory Magazine is reporting that Jerry Jones came very close to passing out as he watched his once proud team play like a bunch of elementary school volleyballers.
The Cowpokes got their asses kicked by the Washington Football Team 25-3, and are simply getting worse, and worse, and worse.
Two of Jerry's relatives had to leave the private visitors’ box, after Jones started to vomit.
Luckily, one of his grandsons was able to move the big bowl of Picante Peanuts before grandpa contaminated the whole damn batch.
A security guard, who did not want his name revealed, said he heard the Cowboys owner sobbing in the restroom, and saying he would gladly trade the entire team for the ten best call girls in Las Vegas.
Meanwhile, Washington linebacker, Jon Bostic (#53) who gave Cowboys quarterback Andy Dalton the most vicious, meanest, most effen cheap shot in history, has been arrested, and is facing up to 24 months in prison.