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Funny story: Clinical Psychologist Tries To Provide Necessary Advice To Depressed Young College Student

Clinical Psychologist Tries To Provide Necessary Advice To Depressed Young College Student

Grant County, Wisconsin. After listening to 19-year-old Timothy Wilber carefully articulate the numerous reasons why he feels lonely, depressed, confused, insecure, and 'out-of-place' as a Philosophy Major at the UW-Platteville School of Engineering...

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Funny story: Lonely College Student Sincerely Hopes He Can Find Controlling Woman To Completely Destroy His Life Upon Graduation

Lonely College Student Sincerely Hopes He Can Find Controlling Woman To Completely Destroy His Life Upon Graduation

Jefferson County, Wisconsin. Soul-crushing despair and unfathomable depression penetrated the highly-sensitive heart of Brad Williams on Thursday, April 18th, at 7:45 pm while he was trying to read a Sociology textbook in his dorm room. Confuse...

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Funny story: Students Transferring To Other Colleges Because Professor Keeps Passionately Talking About "Vlad The Impaler" Instead Of Teaching World History

Students Transferring To Other Colleges Because Professor Keeps Passionately Talking About "Vlad The Impaler" Instead Of Teaching World History

Cedar Falls, Iowa. Finding themselves rather upset that the syllabus of their World History class was not offering the breadth of knowledge they had originally expected to gain at the beginning of the Spring Semester, numerous UNI students made the...

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Funny story: First Year College Student Wards Off Sexual Advances From Academic Advisor While Maintaining Ferocious And Uncontrollable Desire To Become A Historical Archivist

First Year College Student Wards Off Sexual Advances From Academic Advisor While Maintaining Ferocious And Uncontrollable Desire To Become A Historical Archivist

Winneshiek County, Iowa. After clearly stating that he did not want to experience the details of a hot, steamy, intensely-wild, "out-of-control" sex-driven relationship that could possibly go wrong several years down the road, 18-year-old Jeremy Lan...

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Funny story: American Universities Becoming More Successful At Discovering Signs Of "At-Risk" Students

American Universities Becoming More Successful At Discovering Signs Of "At-Risk" Students

With college dropout rates in the United States (and particularly in the Midwest) still a major concern, sources confirmed last Thursday that Universities are becoming more successful at discovering signs of "at-risk" students. Although typical...

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Funny story: Middle Class Parents Glad Their Son Is Dropping Out Of College To Become A Correctional Officer In Order To Support Pregnant Girlfriend

Middle Class Parents Glad Their Son Is Dropping Out Of College To Become A Correctional Officer In Order To Support Pregnant Girlfriend

Madison, Wisconsin. Thomas and Joanna Harper expressed nothing but sheer joy and profound happiness last Thursday when they learned that their son Brad, 22, is dropping out of UW-Madison in order to become a correctional officer after getting 21-yea...

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Funny story: College Student Has Difficulty Preparing For Sociology Exam While Roommate Pleases His Ex-Girlfriend Directly Behind Him

College Student Has Difficulty Preparing For Sociology Exam While Roommate Pleases His Ex-Girlfriend Directly Behind Him

University of Northern Iowa student, Brad Smith, 20, had difficulty studying for his Sociology exam last Tuesday while his roommate was pounding his ex-girlfriend across the room. After hearing painful statements from the love of his life such a...

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Funny story: Pay To Play Into College And The White House

Pay To Play Into College And The White House

Stop picking on Hollywood mothers with big smiles for trying to buy their kid into elite colleges. Indeed, it's painful enough for the mother to admit their kid is hopelessly slow. Why didn't they hire tutors to bridge the gap during high school?...

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Funny story: College Student Forgets Aikido Training While Being Chased By Doppelganger

College Student Forgets Aikido Training While Being Chased By Doppelganger

Grant County, Wisconsin. UW-Platteville student, Craig Smith, 20, completely forgot his Aikido training while being chased by a doppelganger last Saturday. Feeling stressed out with his Sociology and Pre-Algebra courses, Craig left his dorm ro...

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Funny story: Old 'Self-Efficacy' Research Paper With Proper APA Documentation Style Helps Man Remember Just How Depressing, Overwhelming, And Lonely His College Years Were

Old 'Self-Efficacy' Research Paper With Proper APA Documentation Style Helps Man Remember Just How Depressing, Overwhelming, And Lonely His College Years Were

Crawford County, Wisconsin. Feeling lighthearted, happy, and full of joy, Ron Wesley, 38, decided to dig through his basement last Saturday, February 9th, in the sincerest hope that he could remember just how depressing, overwhelming, and lonely his...

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Funny story: A Professor Suffers Collapse— Submission Rejection Delirium

A Professor Suffers Collapse— Submission Rejection Delirium

Two ER physicians at Gabbert General Hospital in Gabbert, Arizona, huddled over the patient still strapped to a gurney. The white male, approximately Medicare age, had been brought in by ambulance just a few minutes earlier. He was unkempt and clearly in a distressed state. There were no signs of injury or trauma, and his vital signs were good, except for somewhat elevated BP. He had no ID, but he...

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Funny story: Harvard to Offer New Major in Pirating and Plundering

Harvard to Offer New Major in Pirating and Plundering

Harvard University announced that it will be offering a new major next fall in Pirating and Plundering. “Harvard is always looking to provide our students with the essential life skills they need to succeed in the real world,” said Walter Vanderbe...

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Funny story: Trump Awarded Honorary Degree by University of Phoenix

Trump Awarded Honorary Degree by University of Phoenix

Last week, the widely-reputed online educational institution the University of Phoenix awarded President Donald Trump an honorary Bachelor of Arts degree in Sociology. “I'm thrilled,” stated President Trump. “Private online education is the wave o...

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Funny story: College Student Kicked Out for Not Being Black Enough

College Student Kicked Out for Not Being Black Enough

New York City, NY - A student was kicked out of his college this week for not being black enough. The former student checked the "Black" box on his college application and was counted as a minority when he was accepted. Once enrolled, the administra...

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Funny story: Mafia Family Members Major in Turf Management

Mafia Family Members Major in Turf Management

New York City, NY - Local universities reported an uptick in popularity in Turf Management Studies, particularly for college applicants with Italian-American backgrounds. Students who major in turf management learn how to maintain the turf on sp...

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Funny story: Jacko and Feducious T. are on a trek to grab ahold of the 'world's perfect beer glass'

Jacko and Feducious T. are on a trek to grab ahold of the 'world's perfect beer glass'

My friend and neighbor Jacko and my old English Comp teacher Feducious T. Flynt stopped by the other day and informed me they were on a sojourn for what they considered to be the quest for the holy grail. "We're taking a road trip, then we'll be t...

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Funny story: Elementary schoolchildren to be forced to pay for own education under the new federal "Fuck Yo Kids" initiative

Elementary schoolchildren to be forced to pay for own education under the new federal "Fuck Yo Kids" initiative

A new federal law that ensures that children will no longer mooch off taxpayer money in order obtain an education at public elementary schools will take effect in 2017. The "Fuck Yo Kids" initiative will force the majority of schoolchildren in the...

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