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Funny satire stories about Roger Goodell

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Funny story: Roger Goodell Out As NFL Commissioner, To Be Replaced By Donald Trump

Roger Goodell Out As NFL Commissioner, To Be Replaced By Donald Trump

New York, NY-After an emergency meeting between the NFL's 32 owners late last night, a decision has been made to unanimously vote Roger Goodell out of his position of Commissioner and, effective immediately, replace him with Donald Trump. The move ca...

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Funny story: 2016 NFL Predictions: Part 2

2016 NFL Predictions: Part 2

*Former Minnesota Viking running back Onterrio Smith makes a comeback, not as a player, but as a pitchman for his new Whizzinator-like product to help players beat drug tests. The product, which is endorsed by the estate of Prince, is called the "Pur...

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Funny story: Contrary to Reports, Roger Goodell Lives!

Contrary to Reports, Roger Goodell Lives!

Reports of Roger Goodell's death are greatly exaggerated. However, he has been brain dead for some time. Fans who checked his tomb found it empty. A member of his staff claimed, "He is risen," in the noonday sun, raising questions on whether Goodell...

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Funny story: Twitter Report of Roger Goodell's Death a Hoax. NFL Admits "He was never alive to begin with..."

Twitter Report of Roger Goodell's Death a Hoax. NFL Admits "He was never alive to begin with..."

A hacker unwittingly exposed the true nature of Roger Goodell by falsely reporting his death on Tuesday June 7, 2016. The NFL's hacked Twitter account announced his passing with the following tweet: "We regret to inform our fans that our commission...

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Funny story: NFL Rebrands Championship Game the "Superblow" for 2016-17 season

NFL Rebrands Championship Game the "Superblow" for 2016-17 season

NFL Commissioner, Roger Goodell, on the heels of uncountable rule changes, arbitrary punishments, and overall ineptitude has contributed what he has refereed to as his "crowning achievement as Commissioner of the NFL". "Starting from the champions...

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Funny story: Depressing British EMO Band to Cap Off NFL Season

Depressing British EMO Band to Cap Off NFL Season

The National Football League has announced the halftime act for its centerpiece spectacular, Superbowl XL - whiny British balladeers Coldplay. The band, whose records have provided the soundtrack to countless teenagers drinking cider alone in their...

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Funny story: Green Bay Packers Are Communists Says Congressman

Green Bay Packers Are Communists Says Congressman

The Green Bay Packers are arguably the most successful franchise in American professional sports history. They just missed this year from going to the superbowel. But the most remarkable thing about the Green Bay Packers is that as an industry th...

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Funny story: NFL Has New Policy Against Cannabis Use

NFL Has New Policy Against Cannabis Use

The NFL is now extensively testing players before football games for marijuana usage. This is a recent policy change. National Footbal League Commissioner Roger Goodell gave an explanation. "The problem with Cannabis is that it is a 'peace" induc...

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Funny story: Ray Rice Suspension Overturned, Now Eligible To Punch Roger Goodell

Ray Rice Suspension Overturned, Now Eligible To Punch Roger Goodell

HOOTERS -- Former Baltimore Ravens running back Ray Rice has had his indefinite suspension from the NFL overturned, and is immediately eligible to punch NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell in the elevator of his office suite. "I just wanna get back to...

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Funny story: NFL's Goodell Speaks On New Peterson Revelation

NFL's Goodell Speaks On New Peterson Revelation

Minnesota Vikings Adrian Peterson, already facing felony charges in Texas for child abuse, was accused in a separate incident involving another son who was 4 years old. In that case Peterson inflicted a head wound on his son, who was in a car seat,...

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Funny story: Roger Goodell Steps Down; Interim Commissioner Ray Lewis to Let Ray Rice Play on Sunday

Roger Goodell Steps Down; Interim Commissioner Ray Lewis to Let Ray Rice Play on Sunday

In a move that surprised no one but the world's biggest misogynists, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell resigned from his duties on Thursday afternoon. In a hastily called press conference, a tearful Goodell said he no longer felt he could make the b...

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Funny story: Goodell: NFL Mistakenly Viewed Erin Andrews Peephole Video in Ray Rice Case

Goodell: NFL Mistakenly Viewed Erin Andrews Peephole Video in Ray Rice Case

MANHATTAN -- Commissioner Roger Goodell has acknowledged that the NFL mistakenly viewed the Erin Andrews peephole video when originally trying to determine appropriate discipline in the domestic violence case against former Baltimore Ravens running b...

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Funny story: NFL Commissioner Allegedly Considering Replacing Human Players With Robots

NFL Commissioner Allegedly Considering Replacing Human Players With Robots

NEW YORK--In an attempt to deal with domestic violence cases which have blackened the reputation of his league, as well as to forestall the further growth of class-action suits pertaining to dementia, concussions and other disorders by National Footb...

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Funny story: Goodell: Red Bull More Integrity-Damaging Than Smacking A Mouthy Broad

Goodell: Red Bull More Integrity-Damaging Than Smacking A Mouthy Broad

MANHATTAN -- NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has announced that he will no longer penalize players for domestic violence, noting that consuming large doses of performance-enhancing Red Bull tarnishes the integrity of the game much more than smacking a...

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Funny story: Hamza Abdullah Disses The NFL

Hamza Abdullah Disses The NFL

NEW YORK CITY - Former NFL safety Hamza Abdullah has just become the most despised man in the entire National Football League, even more so that Detroit's Ndamukong "The Brat" Suh. Hamza Abdullah, took the 2012 NFL season off with his brother fell...

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Funny story: The New York Giants After Starting Off At (0-6) Finally Win One As They Beat The Minnesota Vikings

The New York Giants After Starting Off At (0-6) Finally Win One As They Beat The Minnesota Vikings

EAST RUTHERFORD, New Jersey - Several New York Giants players say that Louisiana voodoo woman Madam Lottie Jo Lafayette came through for them as she put a hex on the Minnesota Vikings who fell to the Giants 23-7. Giants Coach Tom Coughlin was aske...

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Funny story: The NFL May Be Doing Away With Team Huddles

The NFL May Be Doing Away With Team Huddles

NEW YORK CITY - The Sports Bet Gazette is reporting that the National Football League is looking into the possibility of doing away with team huddles. SBG reporter Zorro La Bamba met with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell at a local Pompous Pizza Par...

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