The NFL Cancels All Preseason Football Games

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 22 July 2020

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ESPN says two of the companies that provide hot dog buns and wieners to the NFL may go bankrupt due to the empty stadiums.

NEW YORK CITY – The directors of the NFL have announced that, due to the on-going Covid-19 pandemic, they have decided to cancel the preseason.

The footballs, down markers, and Gatorade containers are being tucked away safely in stadium storage rooms.

An NFL rep commented that, even though the 6-foot distancing rule had been waved by 27 of the 30 owners, there was still the question of players accidentally high-fiving or even hip-bumping each other after a score or a fantastic play, such as a 79-yard pass completion.

Reports are that Tom Brady of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers is extremely disappointed, and downright upset over the decision.

He has made it known that he plans to hire famed Left Coast attorney, Lisa Bloom, and go all the way to the Supreme Court if he has to.

Brady told the Sports Bet Gazette, that he is 42 years old, and that’s 294 in dog years, so he cannot afford to just sit around and get any older.

Meanwhile, the coach for the Cincinnati Bengals, who finished with a record of 2 wins and 14 losses last season, reportedly said, “Great. No problem. Now, if they could only cancel the regular season, my horrible stress will completely go away.”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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