Green Bay Packers Quarterback Aaron Rodgers and NASCAR Driver Danica Patrick Have Broken Up

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 17 July 2020

image for Green Bay Packers Quarterback Aaron Rodgers and NASCAR Driver Danica Patrick Have Broken Up
Aaron reportedly said he'll miss throwing passes to Danica as well as caressing her sweet, sexy, svelte body.

GREEN BAY, Wisconsin – After dating for 2 years and 3 days, and buying a $28 million mansion together, Aaron and Danica will now ‘run and drive’ off into the sunset.

An unidentified neighbor said that they looked so happy. Lots of times he would see them out in the yard, or at the grocery store, and Danica was usually sitting on his neck.

She would yell giddy-up horsey, and the horsey would gallop. The two had lots and lots of wholesome, sexy fun, the neighbor remarked

Some friends are speculating that the reason for the break up could be the fact that Danica missed racing so much, that, at times, she would go to bed wearing her racing suit; complete with racing helmet and racing gloves.

Aaron reportedly hated the fact that it would, sometimes, take him 15 minutes just to undress her, so that he could fiddle with her girly bits.

The word is that Aaron will keep his collection of 47 autographed footballs, and Danica will keep her racing helmet, racing outfit, racing gloves, and her racing jock strap.

And as for the $28 million mansion, there is talk that Russian president Vladimir Putin is interested in buying it.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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