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Funny satire stories about Danica Patrick

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Funny story: Danica Patrick, The NASCAR Princess, Has a Painful Callous On Her Left Foot

Danica Patrick, The NASCAR Princess, Has a Painful Callous On Her Left Foot

GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Satire News) - NASCAR sexpot Danica Patrick informed The Left Coast Mirror's Tequila Tallyho that she is concerned about the fact that she has developed a big callous on her NASCAR brake foot. The race car divaette, who is…

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Funny story: Danica Patrick Says She Received a Text Message From Tom Brady

Danica Patrick Says She Received a Text Message From Tom Brady

GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Sports Satire) - Danica Patrick who is head-over-heals in love with her boyfriend Green Bay quarterback Aaron Rodgers, told her pedicurist that she recently received a text message from Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback Tom Bra…

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Funny story: Danica's NASCAR Babe String Bikini Panties Are America's Top Selling Panties

Danica's NASCAR Babe String Bikini Panties Are America's Top Selling Panties

NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) - When it comes to sexual sensuality, no one can top Danica Patrick. The 5-foot-1-inch dynamo of libido can exude eroticism with the best of them, including Kim Kardashian, J.Lo, Britney Spears, and even Liz Hurley…

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Funny story: NASCAR Princess To Film a Commercial For Danica Patrick 24-Hour Pantiliners

NASCAR Princess To Film a Commercial For Danica Patrick 24-Hour Pantiliners

GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Sports Satire) - The race car driver who is known as "The Princess of NASCAR" is proud to announce that she has just signed a contract to appear in a commercial for Danica Patrick's 24-Hour Pantiliners. Pia Confetti, with S…

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Funny story: Danica Patrick Has a Horrible Wreck In NASCAR's Rebel Yell 400 Race

Danica Patrick Has a Horrible Wreck In NASCAR's Rebel Yell 400 Race

MOBILE, Alabama - (Sports Satire) - The Princess of NASCAR, Danica Patrick was three laps from finishing the very popular "Rebel Yell 400," in Mobile, when she got fendered by new driver Oliver "The Plowboy" Greedygood. According to Pia Confetti w…

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Funny story: Danica Patrick Reveals Her and Aaron Rodgers Favorite Sexual Position

Danica Patrick Reveals Her and Aaron Rodgers Favorite Sexual Position

GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Sports Satire) - NASCAR queen Danica Patrick recently talked to Dottie Bazooka with Sports Balls Illustrated Daily and talk got around to sex. Danica said that Aaron (Green Bay Packers quarterback) is without a doubt the be…

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Funny story: The Sexy Svelte Danica Patrick Wins The Chattanooga 400 Southern Comfort Race

The Sexy Svelte Danica Patrick Wins The Chattanooga 400 Southern Comfort Race

CHATTANOOGA, Tennessee – (Sports Satire) - The Turnstile Review has just stated that the “Queen of NASCAR,” Danica Patrick beat out a field of 42 race car drivers to capture the coveted Chattanooga 400 Southern Comfort Race. TR writer Buckaroo Kaz…

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Funny story: Danica Patrick Talks About The Aaron Rodgers Baby Rumors

Danica Patrick Talks About The Aaron Rodgers Baby Rumors

NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - NASCAR queen, Danica Patrick was in New York City filming a commercial for the brand new Cinderella Brand Ribbed Condoms that have just hit the prophylactic market. She was asked by Pia Confetti with Sportsapalooza…

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Funny story: Danica Patrick Is Coming Out of Retirement - She'll Race In The Atlanta War Between The States 400

Danica Patrick Is Coming Out of Retirement - She'll Race In The Atlanta War Between The States 400

ATLANTA - (Sports Satire) - The sexiest and prettiest NASCAR driver Danica Patrick, told Skin Flix Illustrated Magazine writer Hank Bangbocker, that lately she has been so bored she's been watching rerurns of weather on the Weather Channel. The ho…

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Funny story: Aaron Rodgers Loves How Danica Patrick Can Quickly Transform Herself Into a Human Coffee Table

Aaron Rodgers Loves How Danica Patrick Can Quickly Transform Herself Into a Human Coffee Table

GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Sports Satire) - Aaron Rodgers recently told Carolina Chipotle, with Bedroom Pillow Talk that he is one of the luckiest guys in the entire world. "The Allstate Kid" and super star quarterback for the Green Bay Packers told…

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Funny story: Danica Patrick Explains The Nude Photos of Her And Aaron Rodgers

Danica Patrick Explains The Nude Photos of Her And Aaron Rodgers

NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) - NASCAR princess Danica Patrick recently sat down with Fajita San Guacamole with Hollywood Innuendo at The Intoxicated Iguana Bar in New York City. The two have known each other ever since Danica was in high school…

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Funny story: Aaron Rodgers Says He Has Agreed To Pay Danica Patrick To Stop Texting Him

Aaron Rodgers Says He Has Agreed To Pay Danica Patrick To Stop Texting Him

GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Sports Satire) - According to Sports Territory Magazine, Aaron Rodgers is as happy as a wolf at a sheep convention. The Green Bay QB, told STM's Tango Brisket, that after months and months of pleading with his ex-girlfriend…

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Funny story: Aaron Rodgers Tells Ex-Girlfriend Danica Patrick To Stop Texting Him

Aaron Rodgers Tells Ex-Girlfriend Danica Patrick To Stop Texting Him

GREEN BAY, Wisconsin - (Satire News) - Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers reportedly told his ex-NASCAR driver girlfriend, Danica Patrick, to please not send him anymore texts. According to Sporting Chance Magazine's Hercules Confetti, th…

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Funny story: NASCAR Driver And Aaron Rodgers’ Ex-Girlfriend Danica Patrick Admits She Has a Tattoo on Her Ass With The Intials “AR”

NASCAR Driver And Aaron Rodgers’ Ex-Girlfriend Danica Patrick Admits She Has a Tattoo on Her Ass With The Intials “AR”

GREEN BAY – (Sports Satire) – It is no secret that ever since she was dumped by her Green Bay Packers boyfriend, Danica (Patrick) has been pining about her quarterback. Danica has told close friends that AR has the most amazing cock that she has e…

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Funny story: NASCAR’s Danica Reveals That She Still Has The Hots For Ex-Boyfriend Green Bay Packers Quarterback Aaron Rodgers

NASCAR’s Danica Reveals That She Still Has The Hots For Ex-Boyfriend Green Bay Packers Quarterback Aaron Rodgers

CHEESE OMELETTE, Wisconsin – (Satire News) – The greatest female NASCAR driver of all time, has just admitted that she still pines for her ex-boyfriend Aaron Rodgers. Danica Sue Patrick, recently spoke with reporter Savannah Stiletto with The Dail…

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Funny story: NASCAR’S 1st Transgender Driver Wins Her First Race

NASCAR’S 1st Transgender Driver Wins Her First Race

TOLEDO, Ohio – (Sports Satire) – The NASCAR organization is proud to announce that the Toledo 300 Invitational was won by the organization’s very first transgender driver. Twenty-eight-year-old Catalina Puffinpick captured the coveted race from a…

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Funny story: NASCAR Darling Danica Patrick is Getting Her Butt Back in The Driver’s Seat

NASCAR Darling Danica Patrick is Getting Her Butt Back in The Driver’s Seat

GORGONZOLA CREEK, Wisconsin – (Sports News) – Sports Territory Magazine has just broken the scoop that the racing darling of NASCAR has decided to get back into the world of auto racing. Danica Patrick, who is the ex-girlfriend of Green Bay Packer…

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